The Thunderstorm of 1976 was the largest torrential downpour of precipitation I have ever witnessed in my life. I also kicked its ass. It lasted approximately four hours over Kansas City, Missouri. It was determined to flood the entire Midwest and drown every carbon-based lifeform within Kansas City, and it would have done exactly that if not for my efforts to utterly destroy it. Right about this time my wife walked in. She shouts, "Oh Jon, you big, sexy, well-endowed epitome of man! What are we going to do?!" I simply looked at her, giving her that look of, "Shut up woman, get on my horse."