| Contents | - :Brian: Wow, you went to Harvard, huh? I'm an Ivy League man myself, I went to Brown.
:Wellsley Shepherdson: Ooh, my incarcerated business partner's retarded gay niece went to Brown.
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:Stewie: I read your article too, Brian. Seems to me you should spend less time working on the paper and more time [in a high-pitched voice] working on that novel you've been working on. You know, the one...
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:[Peter shoots the ceiling and Chris falls through]
:Chris: Hi, Dad!
:Peter: Go to your room.
:Chris: OK!
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:Lois: Oh, Brian, I can't believe they fired you! How come you never told us you dropped out of college?
:Chris: I, I saw an after-school special about that! It didn't work out too well for Kristy McNichol, but, then again, nothing did.
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:Gary Coleman: [as Stewie] Whatcha talkin' 'bout, vile woman?!
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:Peter: A-Team roll call. Face?
:Quagmire: Here and handsome!
:Peter: Murdoch?
:Joe: Here, and... crazy!
:Peter: B.A.?
:Cleveland: I pity the fool! But also suggest ways he may better himself.
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