| abstract | - The drugs changed me. They changed who I was, and what I saw. I spent months chained to this dingy hospital bed. Day in and day out, the nurse would bring me food, she would bring me my medication, and would even stay awhile to talk to me. She was my only friend in this godforsaken world, so it seemed. She listened to my rants about modern music, films, and the direction this country was going. She listened. Her gentle, graceful smile would fill my heart up and would make me happier than any of these antidepressants could ever make me. But I wasn’t about to spark up a love interest in my nurse. She was a friend, someone who was there for me in a time of need. She knew me better than anyone else. One morning, the nurse came into my room, and greeted me as usual. Her clear, hazel eyes glistened as the sunlight poured in from the window. She was truly beautiful. I envied her beautiful skin. She fed me my usual medication, and brought me breakfast. We spoke for a few moments, and then she left, again into the hallways of the hospital. Weeks later I began to lose it. The absurd amounts of reruns on television, not being able to see the outside world, and constant screams of the mental patient ward filled the hallways. It was deafening, I was going mad. I stood from my bed and shuffled over to the window. Freedom, I quietly thought to myself. I can’t stay here any longer. The surprise visits from the angelic nurse made this whole ordeal much more bearable. I walked out of the hospital, a free man finally. As I made my way onto the open street, the nurse called to me. Her voice was muffled by a ringing sound, I could barely make out what she was saying, “I love you.” She was weeping, her eyes huge with fright. She was pointing at the door, and through her whimpers I heard her say, “Don’t leave me here.” Her voice echoed through the lobby. The walls swirled in a strange motion, and the lights reflected off strange colours. I walked towards her, and reached out my hand. She quickly backed away, growling, her face morphing into a gruesome appearance. Her eyes were sunken, no longer large and beautiful, her lips worn and dry, I could see the outline of her teeth, her nose was deteriorated, leaving nothing but a gap. Her skin looked as if it were decomposed. She looked up at me and gave the most hideous smile imaginable. She got up, and came closer to me. Her breath smelled of rotting flesh, and her skin seemed forcibly stretched. Through the repetitive ringing I could hear her say, “You don’t know why you’re here, do you?” I couldn’t answer, my mouth felt like it was shut tight. She asked again, “Do you know why you’re here?” Again, I couldn’t answer. The nurse grabbed my face and her hands began to singe inside me. Her sunken eyes looked right at me, and she whispered, “You are condemned. Can’t you see?” Her hands were still searing into my face, all I could feel was a painful, hot sensation piercing throughout all of my head. I grabbed a hold of her face, and sunk my fingers into her black holes. She howled in pain, and let go of my face. None of this can be real, this has to be a dream, I desperately thought to myself. The injured nurse got up from the ground and ran into the blackness of the seemingly endless hospital lobby. That’s when I blacked out. I awoke to the doctor injecting me with syringes full of strange chemicals. I was still dazed, I kept blacking out and catching glimpses of the doctor injecting me, and later, writing on a clipboard. I was confused. Was it all a dream? When I finally came to, the doctor warmly greeted me. “I thought you were never gonna wake up!” He seemed optimistic about my coming to, so I assumed nothing had really happened. I felt weak, drained, I could barely keep my eyes open. After a few minutes, I spoke, “What happened…?” My head hurt. The doctor looked back at me and replied, “Oh boy, well someone slipped an unholy amount of LSD into your food and drinks and you tried to break out.” I was shocked. LSD? Why would anyone do that? I was angry, with myself, with the doctor, the nurse, and whoever fed me that insane amount of LSD. I could still see the strange swirls on the wall, and the doctor was suddenly taller. The nurse was nowhere in sight. Was she hurt? The room grew dark, and my vision became blurred. My heart began to race at an abnormal pace. A shadow appeared in my room, the only light reflecting on it was that of the television. The figure began to shift all around the room, each time coming closer to me. I tried to get up from the bed, but I was tied down by an invisible force. I was motionless. My eyes were wide open to the gaping darkness. I couldn’t see the figure, my only fear was it coming face to face with me. The television screen suddenly exploded. I was now the only soul in this dark hell. I could hear my heart beating, and I’m sure the creature could too, because I suddenly felt a tall presence next to me. I slowly looked up to see the nurse smiling back at me, her beautiful face shining in the darkness. Her smile was crooked, and somewhat uncomfortable to look at. She winked and put her finger over her lips, while making a “shhhhh” sound. My attempts to scream were muffled by an unknown force covering my mouth. The nurse slowly put her hands over my eyes and I felt a slight breeze hitting my face. It was morning, and the hospital room seemed normal again. I looked around, the television was back to normal, and I could move. It was all a dream, I thought to myself while sighing with relief. The nurse entered the room, with her gorgeous smile, and gave her usual greeting, along with my daily meds and breakfast. As she handed me my drink, I saw her slip some tabs into the food and water. I froze in shock. It was her all along. She drugged me, she made me experience hell. She happily handed me my drink and said, “You know, I was kidding when I said you were condemned.” She smiled and left the room.
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