| rdfs:comment | - During his time in Boston in 1754, Haytham met Benjamin Franklin inside a general store.
* Franklin: Hello again.
* Haytham: More Almanac pages?
* Franklin: Not quite. It's a treatise, actually.
* Haytham: Oh? Concerning what?
* Franklin: The benefits of taking an older woman as a lover.
* Haytham: Really? This, I'd like to hear.
* Franklin: First and most obvious – they're wiser. And so this makes for far more stimulating conversation. Makes other things more stimulating as well. But more on that in a moment.
* Haytham: Alright. Your argument for experience makes some sense.
* Franklin: Second, when beauty fades, women must improve their utility – lest they be discarded and forgotten. Rare is an old woman who is not also kind, compassionate, and good.
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| abstract | - During his time in Boston in 1754, Haytham met Benjamin Franklin inside a general store.
* Franklin: Hello again.
* Haytham: More Almanac pages?
* Franklin: Not quite. It's a treatise, actually.
* Haytham: Oh? Concerning what?
* Franklin: The benefits of taking an older woman as a lover.
* Haytham: Really? This, I'd like to hear.
* Franklin: First and most obvious – they're wiser. And so this makes for far more stimulating conversation. Makes other things more stimulating as well. But more on that in a moment.
* Haytham: Alright. Your argument for experience makes some sense.
* Franklin: Second, when beauty fades, women must improve their utility – lest they be discarded and forgotten. Rare is an old woman who is not also kind, compassionate, and good.
* Haytham: That's something of a generalization.
* Franklin: But also true. Now onto the third! Older women cannot conceive! Which means one less thing over which to fret. In fact, you also decrease the chance of acquiring something like the French Pox – its presence clearly visible – or the woman dead.
* Haytham: And should one desire a child?
* Franklin: Then make a young woman your wife. Let the older woman be a mistress. And that brings me to my fourth point: With age comes prudence. An older woman is less likely to reveal your indiscretions.
* Haytham: Yes. I suppose you know quite a bit about that.
* Franklin: And proud of it, thank you! As to the fifth reason: Because in every animal that walks upright, the deficiency of the fluids that fill the muscles appears first in the highest part: the face first grows lank and wrinkled, then the neck; then the breast and arms; the lower parts continuing to last as plump as ever: So covering all the above with a basket, and regarding only what is below the girdle, it is impossible of two women to know an old from a young one. And as in the dark all cats are grey, the pleasure of corporal enjoyment with an old woman is at least equal, and frequently superior, every knack being by practice capable of improvement.
* Haytham: You mad bastard!
* Franklin: Well it's true. And believe me, I should know – I've sampled a great many. You should try one as well! Like a fine wine, they only improve with age. Although... I suppose if left unattended too long, they have a tendency to sour. And that, my friend, is a most unpleasant experience. Better to work in a field often plowed, you know?
* Haytham: Is there more?
* Franklin: Indeed, indeed. The sixth is this: the sin is less. To take a maidenhead is a great responsibility. Mishandled, it can ruin lives. No such risk with an older woman. And this implies the seventh: younger women are more given to compunction. Anxiety and unease are not present in the more aged and experienced. And as to the the last of my reasons. Well it's really quite simple. Older women are so very grateful for the attention.
* Haytham: You make a compelling argument, Mister Franklin. I might just have to run a few tests myself.
* Franklin: I highly recommend it! Haytham spoke to Franklin another time:
* Franklin: I owe you a great thanks by the way.
* Haytham: What for?
* Franklin: Speaking with me. You see, I have very few friends in Boston these days.
* Haytham: And what did you do to earn their ire?
* Franklin: Started with a cartoon I drew, suggesting unification. How else can we hope to withstand the French menace? I proposed something similar at the Albany Conference as well, and it ruffled quite a few feathers. See, I've begun to wonder if Parliament best serves our interests. The Colonies might be better off independent and autonomous. Most of my peers however, haven't taken kindly to the suggestion.
* Haytham: Are things truly so bad under the Crown?
* Franklin: But you've answered your own question! Under! Why under? It should be side-by-side. Does France reside beneath Britain? Do the Italians? The Prussians? The Spanish? No. Sure they may disagree from time to time, even come to blows, but they stand on equal ground, and we should as well.
* Haytham: Are the Colonies not simply an extension of the Kingdom though? Another borough, if you will?
* Franklin: No, we are not. We've evolved into something else, something distinct.
* Haytham: Hmmm, I suppose it's only natural to desire parity. We leave behind our parents, our childhoods, our homes, and seek to find a place in the world. If it's true for a person, why not a nation?
* Franklin: Yes, yes, exactly.
* Haytham: Hmmm, interesting.
* Franklin: Anyway, I've taken up enough of your time. Please, don't let me keep you from your work. Haytham approached Franklin again.
* Franklin: Can't talk right now, I'm afraid...Sorry, but I've some work needs doing...Let us speak later, my friend. Haytham returned to Franklin after having collected one of his almanacs:
* Haytham: Mister Franklin. I believe I have something you'd like.
* Franklin: You... You did it! You find the missing pages! Incredible!
* Haytham: Thank you for the kind words, but it was nothing, really.
* Franklin: Nothing? It was impossible! They were gone. Scattered. And yet here they are, reunited. Franklin gave Haytham 500 pounds.
* Franklin: Here. Take this. Least I can do. You are a miracle worker! I shall sing your praises forever! Much as I'd love to chat, I have some reading to do at present. I hope you understand.
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