| rdfs:comment | - She was born Beryl Armstrong, and later given the code name "Mrs. J". The woman who could single-handedly bring down Stalin, the Shah of Iran, Fidel Castro, Osama Bin Laden, and Captain Underpants was a bouncing plumpkin of joy, and the only such plumpkin born to her decidedly normal parents, Herb and Vera Armstrong. In fact there was nothing within her childhood that would indicate greatness, save for the ability to eat a mud pie every once in a while.
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| abstract | - She was born Beryl Armstrong, and later given the code name "Mrs. J". The woman who could single-handedly bring down Stalin, the Shah of Iran, Fidel Castro, Osama Bin Laden, and Captain Underpants was a bouncing plumpkin of joy, and the only such plumpkin born to her decidedly normal parents, Herb and Vera Armstrong. In fact there was nothing within her childhood that would indicate greatness, save for the ability to eat a mud pie every once in a while. Young Beryl was a normal girl in every sense of the world. Until the day that reached 13, everyone from her teachers to her parents thought that Beryl would do well to give up on the mud pies and learn to cook for real if she was going to capture a husband. However, on the day that she reached that magic number of 13, things inside of Beryl started to boil. Her body burned off the baby fat to make room for the pert nubile breasts that soon followed. Her stubby legs, now free of their chuncky-wunky look, on a sleekness that would be the envy of even Naomi Campbell. The only fly in ointment was her skin, which looked for a time like Disney’s animated version of the moon. But, it too cleared up and revealed stunning good looks. Capping it all off was a brain that was a master in the ancient feminine art of "Knowing"; allowing her to stay two steps in front of everyone else and become an authority on just about everything from dating and hemlines to napalm bombs and the art of Ninja Stars. With movie star good looks, bee stung lips and a body that could only be described by the road sign "WARNING: Dangerous Curves Ahead", one would have thought that young Beryl would have been beating off young men left and right. Oh, sure, guys would ask her out for a date, but they were so stand-offish by the end of the evening that, try as she might, the girl who could have been a young Elizabeth Taylor's dupler (save for her emerald green eyes), could barely get a quick peck goodnight after a movie. Tired of the games with boys, Beryl knew that if she wanted a man, she had to go where men were. She did the only logical thing that a girl could do: she became a Demonstration Model, the only career that could put her looks and beauty to the test.
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