| abstract | - Homer’s epic is of considerably lower quality than his future works. Most scholars are both baffled and appalled at the prose of the epic, wondering exactly how words and phrases equivalent to an ancient Greek version of a stoned and inebriated frat boy are composed in perfect dactylic hexameter. For example: Scholars then go to describe the structure of the plot. The first three-quarters of the book is filled mostly with disgusting and boring action. The latter quarter clumsily attempts to give reason to the fighting, bloodshed, and most unfortunately, the involuntary defecation, by describing the two characters Fate and Destiny as twin brothers, whose father favored Destiny over Fate, turning Fate into a jealous sibling. Homer then adds more last minute plot additions with an oracular prophecy describing the defeat of Fate, who had evidently become an evil tyrant in order to prevent such a fate, by his brother Destiny. This is the first known occurrence of the self-fulfilling prophecy, baffling scholars as to how Homer devised such an advanced concept despite the quality of his composition. Perhaps more indicative of the epic's quality than any literary analysis is the lack of a muse, or at least a proper one, described in these lines: "O, hangover, tell the tale of the raging twins, Fate and Destiny, / And ease my aching head by leaving, if that's okay with you." When asked, scholars describe the beginning as "a bad start."
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