| abstract | - Weird was a great alien emperor of the Peculiur Mothership. One of his great passions was to bombard small inferior planets. He was especially notorious for annihilating small inferior planets that ate mango for supper and breakfast (he refused to acknowledge the existence of lunch). His reign was cut short by unwittingly initiating a war against the mango, known simply as The Mango Wars to those historians to lazy to come up with anything snazzy. A series of battles took place on the Peculiar Mothership during The Mango Wars, but few records have survived the tale. What is known is that Emperor Weird perished during The Battle of Noodles, and was laid to rest in his favorite sofa cushion. Emperor Weird is known to be responsible for the annihilation of many small inferior planets during his rule on the Peculiar Mothership, but since they were small and inferior, this article will not address them further. In shrimp colonies, Emperor Weird was known as the scourge of the sea. The correlation between the two has eluded historians.
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