"Previous Review"@en . . . . . "(We start off with the title card: \u201CIn honor of his very first episode, the Nostalgia Critic will now review the latest Transformers movie: Transformers \u2013 Revenge of the Fallen\u201D) NC: This is the SHIT! Well, OK, not the shit, that was the first film, but this is, uh, uh, uh, ADEQUATELY SATISFYING! So it starts off, like, \u201CThere\u2019s Decepticons all over the world, and we have to find them.\u201D \u201CHmm, that crane thing looks odd.\u201D (Makes the Transformers transformation noises) (He gasps) (He points) \u201CTransformer!\u201D (Pretends to be a Transformer flying in like a winged creature) That\u2019s pretty weak. \u201CCool.\u201D \u201COK.\u201D"@en . . "275.0"^^ . "Running Time"@en . . "Transformers_2_poster_by_MaroBot.jpg"@en . . "Date Aired"@en . . "Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen"@en . . "Next Review"@en . "(We start off with the title card: \u201CIn honor of his very first episode, the Nostalgia Critic will now review the latest Transformers movie: Transformers \u2013 Revenge of the Fallen\u201D) NC: This is the SHIT! Well, OK, not the shit, that was the first film, but this is, uh, uh, uh, ADEQUATELY SATISFYING! So it starts off, like, \u201CThere\u2019s Decepticons all over the world, and we have to find them.\u201D \u201CHmm, that crane thing looks odd.\u201D (Makes the Transformers transformation noises) (He gasps) (He points) \u201CTransformer!\u201D (Pretends to be a Transformer flying in like a winged creature) But it\u2019s OK, \u2018cause a truck is there, and he\u2019s like\u2026 (Makes the Transformers transformation noise) AND IT\u2019S OPTIMUS PRIME! GODDAMN! IT\u2019S SO GOOD TO SEE OPTIMUS PRIME AGAIN! AND NOT ONLY THAT, THERE\u2019S ALL NEW TRANSFORMERS THAT ARE THERE AS WELL! LIKE SIDESWIPE, who I think only has two lines\u2026 ARCEE, who I think only has one line\u2026 AND JOLT, who I don\u2019t think ever talks at all. That\u2019s pretty weak. BUT THE TWINS ARE THERE, AND THEY\u2019RE HILARIOUS! \u201CYo, man, how are we gonna (babbles incoherently)?\u201D \u201CI don\u2019t know! (babbles incoherently)\u201D (Laughs like an idiot) I have no idea what they\u2019re saying. So they came from before. He\u2019s going off to college. And his girlfriend says\u2026 (as Mikaela) \u201CSay you love me.\u201D (as Sam) \u201CSay you love me.\u201D \u201CNo, you say you love me.\u201D \u201CNo, you say you love me.\u201D \u201CLet\u2019s just compromise and say we\u2019re both a-holes.\u201D \u201CCool.\u201D So this kid comes across another kid who thinks the Transformers are real\u2026 And I\u2019m like, \u201CWell, wait a minute. How can they not think they\u2019re real?\u201D \u201CThey had this, like, real huge battle in the opening.\u201D But it\u2019s OK, \u2018cause it turns out that it\u2019s all covered up. (Beat) Yeah, uh, the first film, too. That huge epic battle in the city where, you know, thousands of people were watching? Yeah, that\u2019s-that\u2019s all covered up. (Beat) Pretty lame. But the Decepticons resurrect Megatron! (He gasps) And it turns out he\u2019s controlled by the EVIL FALLEN! Poof! Put a secret language in the kid\u2019s head! So the kid\u2019s like\u2026 (He goes crazy and bounces around the room) And so the EVIL DECEPTICONS want to get what\u2019s in his head! So they send in this really pretty Decepticon to open his mind! Only it\u2019s not a real Decepticon; it\u2019s like a-a-a college girl! It\u2019s a Decepti-slut! So Optimus Prime comes to save the day\u2026 And he battles Megatron! (He pretends to slowly get punched in the jaw on either side) KABOOM! KABOOM! KABOOM! AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, MEGATRON KILLS OPTIMUS PRIME! WH-WH-WH-WH-WH-WHAT?! THAT\u2019S RIGHT! MEGATRON KILLS OPTIMUS PRIME! (As Optimus Prime, he pretends to be stabbed through the chest with a hand pretending to be a knife poking out the front) NOO!! OPTIMUS!! AND I\u2019M JUST LIKE\u2026 \u201CHe\u2019s not dead. He\u2019s not dead. Nonono, he\u2019s not dead.\u201D (He cries and screams in sorrow) (sobs) PRI-HI-HI-HI-HI-HI-HIME! But then I remember when he said a long time ago\u2026 And I quote\u2026 (Cut to Optimus Prime from NC\u2019s \u201CSurf Ninjas \u201D review) Optimus Prime: I died for your sins. (Back to the review) NC: You sure did, Prime. (He sniffles and wipes away a tear) For the sins of us all. So they go to find this other Transformer called Jetfire... And Jetfire is freaking cool! He\u2019s like a Transformer; they were all crotchety old assholes. And that kicks ASS! MAJOR ASSAGE! (Accompanying text appears onscreen) So Jetfire is like\u2026 \u201CWe have to stop the Fallen from creating this pyramid that\u2019ll destroy the sun, and thus, create a bunch of other Transformers, thus ruling the world\u2026\u201D Or some shit like that. WHO CARES? SHIT BLOWS UP! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! KABOOM! KABOOM! KABOOM! (Imitates gunfire) So the Fallen get on all the TVs in the world\u2026 And they\u2019re like\u2026 (Speaks like Dr. Claw from \u201CInspector Gadget\u201D) \u201CHand over the kid, or you\u2019re dog meat.\u201D (Still speaks like Dr. Claw with his fist raised as though wanting vengeance) \u201CAnd I\u2019ll get you next time, Gadget.\u201D And all the people in the world are like\u2026 \u201CHOLY SHIT! ALIENS ARE REAL!\u201D And the government is like\u2026 \u201CIt\u2019s OK. We\u2019ll cover it up.\u201D \u201COh, Ok.\u201D So they get to the pyramids, where apparently, this machine can bring Optimus Prime back to life\u2026 And this super-big-kick-ass-matron pops up! It\u2019s like\u20265 Transformers in one! Holy shi\u2014THAT IS SO COOL!! So I\u2019m like, \u201COH, MY GOD! WHAT THE HELL IS THIS THING GONNA DO?\u201D AND he\u2019s only on the screen for, like, 10 minutes. (Beat) Weak. So we cut to people firing in the desert\u2026 And\u2026firing in the desert\u2026 And then\u2026FIRING IN THE DESERT! But then the kid dies! (He gasps) NOOOO\u2014! I guess it\u2019s not too bad. But then the kid goes to Robot Heaven! (Beat) I\u2019m TOTALLY not kidding! Robot Heaven, where all the other Primes are there, and they give him back his life! (Beat) Weak. So the kid comes back to life, and he tries to use the machine to bring back Optimus\u2026 While they\u2026FIRE IN THE DESERT! So the kid uses the machine\u2026 Rejuvenates Prime\u2026 AND HE\u2019S RESURRECTED! (He raises his arms up in joy as the \u201CHallelujah Chorus\u201D sings in the background) Optimus Prime (from the \u201CSurf Ninjas\u201D review): I died for your sins. NC: (proudly gives a salute) You sure did! (He sniffles and wipes away a tear) But then the Fallen come and take control of the machine! They\u2019re gonna use it to blast out the sun! So they all continue\u2026everyone? (Speaks along with the audience) Firing in the desert. But then Jetfire is like\u2026 \u201CTake my parts, Optimus. I\u2019m old and annoying.\u201D And Optimus Prime says\u2026 \u201COK.\u201D (As Optimus, he pretends to transform into a bigger Prime) And Prime becomes Super-Opti-Mother-Fuckin\u2019 Prime! And he kicks ASS! MORE Major Assage! (Accompanying text appears onscreen) So he goes up against the Fallen and Megatron\u2026 AND\u2026it\u2019s over in, like, a minute. It\u2019s like\u2026(punches a fist into his palm and has both hands collapse) Kcch. Pbbt. Done. (Beat) Weak. So, yeah, the climax is a bit of a cock-tease, but, uh, aside from that, IT WAS GREAT! THUMBS UP! FIVE STARS! GREATEST ADEQUATELY SATISFYING MOVIE OF ALL TIME! And I liked it, too. I\u2019m the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don\u2019t have to! (He leaves the room) (A few seconds later, Chester A. Bum leans his head in from camera left to look off to where NC walked off) Chester A. Bum: Dude, did he just steal my act?"@en . "Website"@en . "2009-06-27"^^ . . "320"^^ . "Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen"@en . .