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Balto is a 1995 American animated feature film loosely based on the Daniel P. Mannix novel of the same name, produced by Universal Animation Studios and released in the United States on December 22, 1995, and it's the 24th film in the Universal Animated Canon. Balto was the final animated feature produced by Steven Spielberg's Amblimation animation studio. Although the film's theatrical run was overshadowed by the success of the competing Pixar film, Toy Story, its subsequent strong sales on home video led to two direct-to-video sequels Balto II: Wolf Quest (2002) and Balto III: Wings of Change (2004). Balto was the final animated feature produced by Steven Spielberg's Amblimation animation studio. It was followed by two direct-to-video sequels Balto II: Wolf Quest (2002) and Balto III: Wings of Change (2004). Balto is a wolf Balto is the main character in Balto and its sequels, Balto II: Wolf Quest and Balto III: Wings of Change. He's also the mate of Jenna and the father of Aleu, Kodi, Dingo, Yukon, Nunivat and Saba. He was voiced by Kevin Bacon in the first film and Maurice LaMarche in the sequels. Balto is based on the real dog of the same name. Balto was a male Human from Kalarba. He was the husband of Lilta, and the couple had several kids together. Balto helped Baron Pitareeze escape the clutches of Olag Greck. Little Girl: Wow! So this is where all the Nostalgia Critic episodes were filmed years ago! (she looks around) Aunt Despair (also played by Tamara): (coming in) You got it, bucko. They kept everything the same to preserve its history. Look at all the reviews that they did. Aunt Despair: (pointing to Batman v Superman poster) There's Shrek... (points to Mad Max poster) There's Schindler's List Saves Christmas... (points to Pixels poster) ...And that one. (points offscreen) But this... this is what I really wanted to show ya. Little Girl: Is that the DVD from the Balto review, Aunt Despair? Balto is a 1995 animated movie produced by Steven Spielberg's animation studio, Amblimation, based loosely on a real sled run from 1925. A bunch of kids are sick in Nome, Alaska. The only way to get medicine is through a team of sled dogs. When the capable but completely self-absorbed lead dog, Steele (voiced by Jim Cummings), gets his team lost, saving the town falls on the shoulders (so to speak) of a half-dog, half-wolf named Balto (voiced by Kevin Bacon). He's accompanied by a Russian goose named Boris (voiced by Bob Hoskins), a female dog named Jenna (voiced by Bridget Fonda), and two hydrophobic polar bears named Luk and Muk (voiced by Phil Collins). Balto is a "smart"UNSC AI that was programmed straight into the Halcyon-class Cruiser ship Explosive Rain's mainframe.Balto is able to coordinate slipspace jumps twice as fast as any smart AI that could. thumb|260px Balto es una película estadounidense de animación combinada con actuación, de 1995; producida por Amblimation, una división de Amblin Entertainment, empresa de Steven Spielberg; dirigida por Simon Wells. Basada en la historia de Balto, un perro de trineo, de raza Siberian husky, que durante una epidemia de difteria en Alaska en el año 1925, lideró la caravana de mushing que recorrió 1.085 kilómetros en cinco días y medio, llevando vacunas desde la ciudad de Nenana hasta la ciudad de Nome. La proeza salvó la vida de muchos niños.

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Balto is a "smart"UNSC AI that was programmed straight into the Halcyon-class Cruiser ship Explosive Rain's mainframe.Balto is able to coordinate slipspace jumps twice as fast as any smart AI that could. Balto is a wolf Balto is a 1995 American animated feature film loosely based on the Daniel P. Mannix novel of the same name, produced by Universal Animation Studios and released in the United States on December 22, 1995, and it's the 24th film in the Universal Animated Canon. Balto was the final animated feature produced by Steven Spielberg's Amblimation animation studio. It was followed by two direct-to-video sequels Balto II: Wolf Quest (2002) and Balto III: Wings of Change (2004). Balto was the final animated feature produced by Steven Spielberg's Amblimation animation studio. Although the film's theatrical run was overshadowed by the success of the competing Pixar film, Toy Story, its subsequent strong sales on home video led to two direct-to-video sequels Balto II: Wolf Quest (2002) and Balto III: Wings of Change (2004). Balto is the main character in Balto and its sequels, Balto II: Wolf Quest and Balto III: Wings of Change. He's also the mate of Jenna and the father of Aleu, Kodi, Dingo, Yukon, Nunivat and Saba. He was voiced by Kevin Bacon in the first film and Maurice LaMarche in the sequels. Balto is based on the real dog of the same name. Little Girl: Wow! So this is where all the Nostalgia Critic episodes were filmed years ago! (she looks around) Aunt Despair (also played by Tamara): (coming in) You got it, bucko. They kept everything the same to preserve its history. Look at all the reviews that they did. Aunt Despair: (pointing to Batman v Superman poster) There's Shrek... (points to Mad Max poster) There's Schindler's List Saves Christmas... (points to Pixels poster) ...And that one. (points offscreen) But this... this is what I really wanted to show ya. (The girl looks down at where Aunt Despair is pointing; it's a DVD for Balto; she looks quite surprised) Little Girl: Is that the DVD from the Balto review, Aunt Despair? Aunt Despair: Yep, and I was there when it was shot. Little Girl: GASP! You mean it's a true story?! Aunt Despair: (holding up a small flat bottle) Based... Based on a true story. Little Girl: Wow! Would you mind telling me the tale, Aunt Despair? Aunt Despair: (unscrewing the bottle) After I have a sip of my storytelling sauce. (takes a drink) Little Girl: Oh, the same sauce that makes you good at slow-mo leapfrog with me. Aunt Despair: Our story begins on the Nostalgia Critic, sitting down at the desk he normally does... NC: Hello, I'm the Nostalgia Critic. I remember it so you don't have to. Let's talk about a little film called Balto. NC (vo): Despite doing poorly with both critics and box office, the film eventually found success on home video, leading to a ton of VHS and DVD sales. So, I guess it got the reputation of the not-really-little-film than not-really-could, but turned into profit eventually, so... (DVD covers for Balto 2: Wolf Quest and Balto 3: Wings of Change are shown) table-scrap sequels for all! Based on a true story, it covers a dogsled that has to race against time to get medicine to a town full of dying children. Even though it's gathered the nostalgic following, we should still ask, "Does the film really hold up years later?" NC: Whether it does or doesn't, we're not gonna get any movies about heroic cat sleds, are we? (A cat puppet suddenly appears) Cat Puppet: Hey! I resent that! (Both NC and the Cat Puppet start laughing until we cut to the Little Girl) Little Girl: Wait a minute, wait a minute! There's talking animals in this? Aunt Despair: Sure, why not? Little Girl: I thought you said this was a true story. Little Girl: Did you just hallucinate that there were talking animals? Aunt Despair: Possible. I just had a Nicotine Patches to my daily smoking, so I'm feeling a little queasy. I'ma lie down. Little Girl: But what about the story? Aunt Despair: OK. Are you gonna shut up or you gonna keep being little Ms. YouTube Comments? Little Girl: (Hugging her teddy) OK. I'm sorry. Aunt Despair: That's better. (clears throat in a disgusting way, causing Little Girl to grimace in revolution) That's a good high. Anyways, the Critic started his review... (The scene fades to NC's room. NC calms down his laughing) NC: Let's take a look at Balto. NC (vo): So this animated story about a dog racing across Alaska opens with live-action people in the middle of New York. NC: You sure we didn't put on Professor Sprout visits the Muggleverse? (We see footage of old Rosy beside him) NC: (vo): A woman and her grandchild are looking for a memorial site, as she decides to force the kid to sit on a bench for an hour and a half while she tells the story. Rosy (Miriam Margolyes): In the cold winter of 1925, it was snowing hard. (The film shifts from live-action to animation as we're shown a snowy forest as she says this) NC: (as Rosy) Things were animated back then. I dare even say, with a Spielberg vibe! NC (vo): We see Alaska's portrayal of Ben-Fur... NC (vo): ...as we're introduced to our half-wolf, half-dog hybrid, Balto, played by Kevin Bacon. He's also joined by a goose, played by, I think, Bob Hoskins' drunken rants from the Super Mario Bros. movie. Boris (Bob Hoskins): (yelling with a clear accent) When will you learn to stay on the sidelines?! NC: Aww. It's his best Russian accent since Enemy at the Gates. Khrushchev (Hoskins): (with almost the same accent) Stalingrad. (Back to Balto) NC (vo): They're watching a sled race led by a dog named Steele, who is so mean that literally every frame is determined to convince you he's pure evil! Steele (Jim Cummings): (to Balto) Get out of here, wolf-dog. You'd better get back to your (spits) pack. / (to Jenna) Well, maybe your taste runs more toward...wolf. / (carrying sausages in his mouth) Jenna, join me for dinner. NC (vo): I've never seen a bad guy where, every second, he's moving in some sort of obviously diabolical manner. Steele: (to Balto) You were the fastest...what? / (after Jenna refuses to him) Ohh. (inhales) NC (vo): Most villains have some normal everyday movements, but 24/7, this guy is like... NC: (speaks in an over-the-top villain fashion while also jiggling his hands) Would you like some ice creeeam? You can trust meeee! I'm oooozing with pleasantness! NC (vo): Every angle is evil, (a small clip of Steele howling to the sky is shown) except for maybe this one that...that looks like a girl's T-shirt from an AnimeCon... (a picture of a said girl is shown briefly, with howling Steele Photoshopped on her shirt) But look at this! Even when he's turning around, he looks evil! Steele: (as he walks towards Balto while also turning to the camera) I'm sorry. Balto. Balto the half-breed. (The other dogs all ooh and laugh at this) NC: (still speaking in the same villain fashion, with chair turned right) Oh, you want me to turn around? Okay! (He turns around very close to the camers, laughing madly) Oh! You want me to do it again?! NC (vo): Everybody mocks Balto for being a hybrid, the humans are afraid of him, and the dogs think he's an outcast. Leading to probably the film's most poignant line. Boris: Not a dog, not a wolf. All he knows is what he is not. NC: Wow, that was actually pretty heavy. How are you gonna follow something as complex as that up? (Wind-up cat toy wheels by Balto curled up under a blanket) NC: (pause) So that just happened. NC (vo): Oh, there's also Bob Hoskins doing the goose step. NC: So, at this point, you might be wondering where does the comedy in this kids' film lie, particularly with the goose. NC (vo): Is this LEGO Batman funny (The LEGO Batman Movie poster is shown) or The Nut Job territory? (The Nut Job poster is then shown) Well, let's look at the chart. (The round chart with various annoying characters is shown, clockwise: B.E.N. from Treasure Planet (1 - Slightly Annoying), Olaf from Frozen (2 - Eye Twitch Worthy), the Minions from Despicable Me (3 - Just Annoying Enough), Snarf from Thundercats (4 - Damn Obnoxious), Orko from He-Man and the Masters of the Universe (5 - Shit, It's That Kind of Show) and Gurgi from The Black Cauldron (6 - Burn it and Salt the Ground). Boris' head, located in the center, starts moving slowly) NC (vo): Yes... Yes... (The head ends up in...) DAMN IT! Just Annoying Enough! NC: They've entered the Sinbad Zone! NC (vo): Oh, there's also these... I think polar bears, but they look more like Moogles (from Final Fantasy) if they ate Chien-Po. And to possibly make things worse, they're voiced by Phil Collins. Muk (Phil Collins): We love you, Uncle Boris! NC: Oh, Christ! (picks up the DVD case, looking at the credits and description) Not a musical. Oh, you are a kind movie! NC (vo): So while having fun at beautiful o'clock and presumably striking a trailer pose... NC: Let me see here... (A VHS trailer for the movie is shown, with the same clip serving as the background for the title) Yup. That's uncompressed enchantment. NC (vo): ...bad news seems to be rolling in. NC (vo): ("translating" the message in a robotic voice) Movie lagging. Need story. Send disease, preferably child killing. (normal, after a "ding!" sound is heard upon going to the next scene) There you go! A horrible epidemic seems to be sweeping the town as Rosy, the woman telling the story shown here as a kid, is being comforted by her dog Jenna, played by Bridget Fonda. Rosy's father (William Roberts): Rosy, come on. You're gonna catch your death out here. NC (vo, as Rosy's father): Come and catch it inside! It's a stronger visual for younger viewers. Jenna (Bridget Fonda): Hi. Balto: Hi. Jenna: Rosy's in there. Balto: In a hospital? Why? NC (vo): Balto, of course, has the hots for Jenna, but she's too distracted by what'll happen to Rosy. Balto: I know how to find out. Come on. NC (vo, sarcastically): Based on a true story! NC: If your dog can't do that, he's stupid. Doctor (Donald Sinden): Looks like diphtheria. And I'm out of antitoxin. Balto: Jenna! Jenna, I'm sorry. NC (vo, as Balto): You know I'm voiced by Kevin Bacon, right? And I like eating bacon. That's, like...two degrees of me. (normal) Thus, a dogsled race will be done to determine which dogs will go out to take the medicine. (beat) Which you'd think they figure out from the races they just had! NC: Time's a factor here, guys. NC (vo): Of course, though, Balto enters himself in. Steele: Do you honestly think any musher would ever put you on his team? You're even more mixed up than I thought. NC: Ha! Joke's on you! Years from now, they're gonna name a Shaquille O'Neal movie after you! Jenna: As long as the medicine gets through, stop being such a glory hound. Steele: You're 100% right, Jenna, I... I... I wasn't thinking about those children. NC (vo, chuckles): Good Lord! It's like his face has ten different personalities, and they all eat children! Steele: (to Balto) I'm gonna fold you five ways...and leave you for a cat toy. NC: (as Steele) Then you'll be a part of awkward punchlines like this! NC: (as Steele) Shaaaame! NC (vo): So while Indiana Jones starts his winter vacation, the dogs' sled, led by Steele, travels through the snow to get the medicine. NC (vo, as the conductor): This is the Polar Not-Going-Anywhere! Please hand over your one-way ticket to Diphtheria! Star (Robbie Rist): Maybe we should go back. We're lost. Steele: I am NOT LOST! NC: Yeah, you know dogs really are the worst with directions. It's like when I let my dog drive. NC: All right, just back out, nice and smooth. Little Girl: Wait a minute! He let a dog drive? Aunt Despair: I guess. Little Girl: This true story of yours doesn't seem to make very much sense. Why would anybody let a dog drive? Shouldn't it be the human who's doing the driving? Aunt Despair: Look, I'm telling the story to a kid. Of course I'm gonna take some creative liberties. Because I think you're dumb. Little Girl: (gasps) How much of your story is actually true? Aunt Despair: (interrupts) The Critic continues his review... Little Girl: Oh, my God... Aunt Despair: ...talking about when one of the dogs gets some bad news... Dog: It's terrible, my friends. Just terrible. NC: (as a dog) I speak Bark. Which I...thought we were all speaking, but apparently not. NC (vo): It looks like the sled is missing in the storms. Well, okay. I'm sure a slight delay won't be a major issue... (We are shown the three - yes, three - freshly made coffins in the barn) Oh, GOD!! Shit's gettin' real, man! NC: I'm just assuming the other coffins are for... NC (vo): Tiny Tim, Little Matchgirl and Fullmetal Alchemist spoiler (Chimera Nina Tucker)! NC: Don't act like that can't happen! There's dogs in this world. NC (vo): Sugar-fried Jesus, what do you follow a scene like that up with? Boris: When you are big frozen-stiff statue named Balto... NC (vo): Ah, yes. The comedy stylings of characters you'd much rather eat than listen to. This seems totally appropriate now! Boris: (hitting on his head) I'm beginning to understand the bear! NC: (hand on cheek) Oh, what a shame this isn't a musical. Could you see Phil Collins obnoxiously explaining in song what doesn't need to be explained? NC (vo, as Phil Collins, sings to the tune of "You'll Be in My Heart"): Them coffins there / Means some kids gonna die / Phil Collins says / This is where you cry / Some vague emotions about / Love, inspiration, stuff, and... / Where's my paycheck? I gotta fly! NC: (as Jenna) I smell boyfriend material! Jenna: Balto... NC (vo): Jenna figures out Balto's going to find the sled and deliver the medicine. He marks his trail by scratching the trees because of...dog-and-wolf sense of smell, which has get them lost, as we see Steele's gang is in big trouble. NC (vo, as Steele): I call it, let's eat him! Come on, you act like you never ate human flesh before! (normal) But our heroes come across the biggest threat in animated movies: a bear. NC: No! Don't you know they ruin animated films now?! NC (vo): (posters of...) Open Season! Brother Bear! Brave! Norm of the North! NC: Their destruction knows no rewrites! NC (vo): Speaking of which, even as black bears go, that is a pretty damn black bear! Did he bathe in ink after swimming through oil from a lake in Sin City? NC: He's so black his blood is coffee! NC (vo): But Jenna saves the day as they leave the bear into the ice. NC (vo): That's right. Return to your home planet, whatever species you were supposed to be! Muk: Geronimo! NC (vo): There you go. Go save him, polar bears, rather than fight the...other bear that you should technically be bigger than... NC: Is this like when (pictures of...) Pluto's on a leash, but Goofy can walk around; we just don't question that? NC (vo): But Jenna damages her leg, so the comic air quote "relief" take her back while Balto moves forward, eventually meeting up with the sled. Steele: I'll get us back. I'm the lead dog. I'm in charge. Nikki (Jack Angel): Two bones says Steele takes him. Katlag (Danny Mann): Ha! You're on. NC (vo): Gambling dogs. This must be Michael Vick's favorite scene. NC: Whew! Have to blow the dust of that one. (He blows the dust from a box with "Michael Vick Joke" on it) NC (vo): But Steele wants the glory, so he fights Balto despite him not fighting back. Thank God kids' film's favorite pacifism, because Steele falls off a cliff mid-ass-beating. NC (vo): Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. (And yet, Steele survives!) NC: Oh, I mean, totally alive. NC (vo): But even with Balto leading the way, Steele still manages to stop the medicine from getting to dying kids. Steele: (panting, with Jenna's red bandana in his teeth) Go ahead, wolf-dog! You'll never get home! (He starts scratching the trees to mislead Balto and the sled) How about over here?! Oops, wrong way! (laughs) NC: Holy shit, what is wrong with this character?! NC (vo): This is a village of kids that are going to die! Bad dog! Bad dog! Steele: I'll show 'em. NC: (as Steele) I'm also gonna create three new cancers as soon as I get home! NC (vo): So Balto as well loses his way, but is determined to move forward. (beat) Right off the cliff. NC: Well, it's all okay no– (The crate with medicine inside tilts) Oh. Spoke too soon. NC: Well, it's all okay no– (The snowpack Balto is standing on collapses) What the fuck?! NC (vo): Gravity was nicer to its main character! Both the movie and the concept! (Poster for the movie Gravity and the scheme of Newton's law of universal gravitation are shown) Meanwhile, back at the village, the others try to figure out why Balto went looking for them (the sled). Jenna: He's tracking them. Dog 2: Tracking a championship team, in a blizzard? NC: (laughs mockingly) Kids are dying, still. You gotta laugh, don't you? (He resumes laughing. The clip of three coffins is shown again, and he points and waves at it, still laughing) NC (vo): But Steele makes it back. He tells them a false story about how Balto tries to sabotage the mission, ending up with the other dogs getting killed. Steele: I– I went on, dragging the medicine alone, all alone... Balto, he...he demanded I let him take the medicine. But he couldn't handle it. (takes out Jenna's bandana) He...made me promise to take...care of you, Jenna. (Jenna cries) NC: Wow! This guy is such an obvious yet evil liar, he should probably get a job at the White House. Steele: The other dogs died and I was the only one left. Period. Also the race I was a part of had the largest audience to ever witness a dogsled race. Period. Reporter (voiced by Doug): But, sir, we have eyes– Steele: Your eyes are wrong! It's an alternative bark! Reporter: But, Melissa– Steele: Stop calling me that!! NC (vo): But Jenna doesn't believe him and notes that Balto is still out there, trying to get the medicine for poor Rosy. Aunt Despair: (suddenly appears around the corner) Hey, do you have any nicotine patches? NC: No. What the hell are you doing here? Aunt Despair: I've been coughing up a lung on your couch. I figured if I was lightheaded, I wouldn't mind so much. NC: Why are you sleeping on my couch? Aunt Despair: It's a nice couch. NC: Get out of here!! Aunt Despair: Okay. Little Girl: Dude! That's your only contribution to the story: just laying in bed and coughing?! Aunt Despair: Maybe. Little Girl: How did you know that any of this was going on, then? You weren't there, you didn't see it, and the majority of it sounds it was possibly made up! Aunt Despair: Well, kid, what am I supposed to say here? "And then I looked at the ceiling longer?" "And then I coughed 87 more times?" I've got to embellish. Little Girl: Is any of this story true? Aunt Despair: Come on. Is it so hard to believe that I was lost, passed out when annoying people? Little Girl: I guess that's a good point. Aunt Despair: Speaking of which, go get me some gin from the fridge. Let's see how many shots it takes to forget your name. NC (vo): So Balto is separated from his team and still has the medicine, but comes across... NC: ...Kimba the White Wolf? NC (vo, as the wolf): Well, that's all I got. A one "aroo", man, to us, that's like brain surgery. NC (vo): So, apparently, that gives him superpowers to drag the medicine up a cliff. NC: (looks around) How do you think grandma explained that? NC (vo, as Rosy): And then, the god of the wolves came or something... (as the granddaughter) Wait, what? (Rosy) And they then they howled at the sky, making Balto physically stronger, I gues... (granddaughter) I'm not following any of this. (Rosy) And even though that wolf could've helped pull the sled or give directions; he just kind of disappeared and was never seen again. (granddaughter) Grandma, are you off your meds? (Rosy) They make me catch the gay! NC (vo): So the team is back on track, as Balto uses his nose to find the way. Why didn't he just use that before? I-Is that a weird prejudice, too; dogs don't sniff to find stuff? NC: How dare you use your nose! Don't you know what disgusting animal you're sounding like?! (pause) Toucan Sam. (Toucan Sam pops up in the corner) NC (vo): But because this film loves to punish all signs of hope, it tries to toss them off a bridge. (Balto and the team crosses an ice bridge, which cracks and collapses underneath them, causing them all to slide down the steep cliff. Balto grabs hold of a nearby branch sticking out of the snow, stopping their falling and helping the team to climb the cliff) Followed by an avalanche. OH, COME ON!! NC: The moral of the story is nature sucks, kids! Don't play in the snow! It'll someday fight back! NC: Hey, you know what's missing in this scene? A Phil Collins song. NC (vo, as Phil Collins, singing): I'm scared of snow / You should be afraid, too / I’ll tell you how to feel ALL the way through NC (vo): They get trapped inside a cave where the movie reminds us that Spielberg produced this film. Star: (imitating E.T.) Oooh! NC: (as Star imitating E.T.) I’ll be right in my legal authority to satirize this property. NC (vo): But if that two seconds of levity was overbearing, don't worry, because giant killer icicles are after them now! (Balto and the team narrowly dodge the falling stalactites. Clip from Saving Private Ryan is shown) Medic Wade: JUST GIVE US A FUCKING CHANCE, YOU SON OF A BITCH!! NC (vo): Oh, look, the medicine crate has a crack in it, too! (Balto sees one of the medicine vials fall out and smash. Clip from A Fish Called Wanda is followed) Otto: FUCK YOOUUU!! NC: They should call this movie... (Balto movie poster pops up, with the title replaced by...) NC (vo): They do eventually make it out, though, as Jenna reflects some bottles that...apparently light up the entire town... (Balto spots this) which Balto would've plainly see anyway, so it is kinda pointless. Boris: Balto's back! NC: Ohhh...and a meteor hits him. (This doesn't happen in the movie; but, yeah, a meteor appears out of nowhere and crushes the sled) I'm so sorry, kids. Life just didn't like this dog. Nature is kind of like God's hitman. NC (vo): But news reaches Steele about Balto's return, which pisses off the rest. Steele: (as everyone leaves him) Okay, okay. I can explain. You guys weren't there, so you don't... Wait a minute, guys... wait just a second... NC: (as Steele) Oh, come on! I was trying to do a reverse Cruella De Vil. You know, an evil dog who wants to kill a bunch of little kids? I will be on someone's best villains list! NC (vo): The medicine is received, Balto gives a hat made from his bretheren, and Jenna gives him the equivalent of dog Frenching. (Balto and Jenna's noses make contact) Well, this is such a joyous occasion, let's give Balto absolutely no lines whatsoever! Yeah, I'm not even kidding. He doesn't speak in the last 25 minutes of this movie. They cut his dialogue, aside from an occasional word like "Oof!" or "Ah!". The other dogs get a lot of lines, but, for whatever reason, Balto was almost completely silent. Then again, that might be for the best. With everything they threw at him, his dialogue probably wouldn't be very kid-friendly. NC (vo, dubbing Balto): Ah, shit. (A clip of an avalanche is then shown) Goddammit! (Then we go to the falling stalactites scene) Seriously, did I run over a leprechaun? What is all with the bullshit bad luck?! Granddaughter: This is it, Grandma! Blaze found it. NC (vo): So Rosy's story seems to be over, as they find the monument dedicated to the dogs that made that journey. Rosy: (reading) "In the winter of 1925..." Granddaughter: Balto really did do all of that, didn't he, Grandma? Rosy: Oh, yes, sweetheart, he really did. NC: I shouldn't. I really shouldn't. (beat) Come on, let the kids have their ("air quotes") true story. NC: "Balto facts." (looks at the camera) You're not gonna like it. ("DO IT!" appears again) You're really not gonna like it. NC (vo): Balto did not run the longest, nor most hazardous, part of the journey. The most dangerous and longest run was led by a dog named Togo, driven by a musher named Seppälä. In fact, there were 20 mushers of varying dogs used to make the journey. Balto just happened to be the last one, so he got the majority of the credit. While Seppälä and Togo did the hardest work, it was Balto that got all the fame, even from President Calvin Coolidge. In fact, there was such a hatred for Balto getting all the credit, that him and his owner... Little Girl: ...weren't even welcome to the award ceremony in New York for Seppälä and Togo. Little Girl: This was all BULLSHIT, WASN'T IT?! Aunt Despair: Well, there was an incredible review done entirely by the Nostalgia Critic. NC: Ah, there it is. NC: 'Bout time I film the sucker. Little Girl: Wait a minute! Nostalgia Critic is still alive and hasn't even filmed the review yet? NC: Well, no...random kid. I was just about to, just to get the script from my brother. You see, I was sick, so he wrote the majority of it this week. Little Girl: Oh, my God. So we're not even in the future, are we?! NC: ...You're a special kid, aren't you? Little Girl: But what about the text that says we are? Aunt Despair: Oh, that's just my satanic arts. Little Girl: YOU LIED! You lied about practically everything! Aunt Despair: Okay, look. Maybe everything didn't happen like I said. Maybe credit was given to the wrong person. And maybe, like, 98% of what you heard was false. But...did you have fun? Little Girl: I guess. Aunt Despair: Was it corny, but beautiful at times? Little Girl: I suppose. Aunt Despair: And did you know anything at all about these dogs saving kids before I told you? Little Girl: Not really. Aunt Despair: Well, then, for pulling most of this out of my ass, I'd say we had a pretty entertaining time. Little Girl: I never thought of it like that. Hey, Critic, what did you think of Balto, by the way? NC: ...Basically that. Little Girl: Oh, wow! Maybe there's more truth to fiction than I thought. NC: Actually, there isn't. That was just a huge coincidence. (to Aunt Despair) Speaking of which, why did you bring her here to begin with? Aunt Despair: Oh, I just wanted to leave her here so I didn't have to tell her that both parents died from double erotic asphyxiation. Aunt Despair: (throws away the cigarette from her mouth) Well, that backfired. She's all yours, Critic! Creepy Dad: What kept you? Aunt Despair: A child's mind is very delicate. (gets in) Floor it! NC: Don't worry. I know a certain long-faced, balding, big-toothed comedian who would love to take care of you. Little Girl: Oh... NC: (offscreen) She's all yours, Chester. Chester: OH, MY GOD! I'm a mother! Channel Awesome Tagline - Steele: Well, maybe your taste runs more toward wolf. thumb|260px Balto es una película estadounidense de animación combinada con actuación, de 1995; producida por Amblimation, una división de Amblin Entertainment, empresa de Steven Spielberg; dirigida por Simon Wells. Basada en la historia de Balto, un perro de trineo, de raza Siberian husky, que durante una epidemia de difteria en Alaska en el año 1925, lideró la caravana de mushing que recorrió 1.085 kilómetros en cinco días y medio, llevando vacunas desde la ciudad de Nenana hasta la ciudad de Nome. La proeza salvó la vida de muchos niños. Balto is a 1995 animated movie produced by Steven Spielberg's animation studio, Amblimation, based loosely on a real sled run from 1925. A bunch of kids are sick in Nome, Alaska. The only way to get medicine is through a team of sled dogs. When the capable but completely self-absorbed lead dog, Steele (voiced by Jim Cummings), gets his team lost, saving the town falls on the shoulders (so to speak) of a half-dog, half-wolf named Balto (voiced by Kevin Bacon). He's accompanied by a Russian goose named Boris (voiced by Bob Hoskins), a female dog named Jenna (voiced by Bridget Fonda), and two hydrophobic polar bears named Luk and Muk (voiced by Phil Collins). The movie wasn't a big success in the box office. It earned $11,348,324 in the United States market, the 106th most successful film of its year. But it more than covered its small budget and sold decently at VHS. It spawned two Direct to Video sequels nonetheless: Balto II: Wolf Quest (2002) and Balto III: Wings of Change (2004). The fanbase is heavily divided as to if the sequels are good or bad, and the francise hasn't seen any new movies since 2004. Probably for the better, since Universal went rather overboard with The Land Before Time sequels. Balto was a male Human from Kalarba. He was the husband of Lilta, and the couple had several kids together. Balto helped Baron Pitareeze escape the clutches of Olag Greck.