| abstract
| - The study group gets together for a housewarming party for Troy and Abed's new apartment. Everything's going normally until the pizza arrives and nobody wants to go down to get it. Jeff suggests rolling a six-sided die to decide who goes down, and Abed mentions that in doing so he's creating six different timelines. They even come conveniently numbered by the die role they're associated with. Just as Abed predicted, the die roll causes the episode to split into six different stories depending on who went down to get the pizza. Timeline 1 (Community 2): Annie goes to get the pizza. While she's away, Jeff stops Britta from singing "Roxanne." Britta goes to the bathroom. Pierce volunteers the fact that he had sex with Eartha Kitt in an airplane bathroom. Troy finds a gun in Annie's purse. Pierce gives Troy a housewarming present. Jeff bumps his head on the ceiling fan. Abed tells Britta that the bathroom smells funny now. Annie arrives with the pizza. Timeline 2 (Community 4): Shirley goes to get the pizza. While she's away, Jeff stops Britta from singing "Roxanne." Britta goes to the bathroom, while Pierce volunteers the fact that he had sex with Eartha Kitt in an airplane bathroom. Pierce gives Troy a housewarming present: a Norwegian troll that Troy was scared of when he lived with Pierce. Shirley arrives with the pizzas to find that nobody took her pies out of the oven and now they are burned. Timeline 3 (Community 3): Pierce goes to get the pizza, but not before he volunteers the fact that he had sex with Eartha Kitt in an airplane bathroom. Jeff stops Britta from singing "Roxanne" and she goes to the bathroom. Jeff insults Troy, so he goes to the bathroom to find Britta was smoking a joint. He and Britta bond over the fact that he's an adult now. Jeff hits his head on the ceiling fan and is tended by Annie. Pierce arrives with the pizza. Timeline 4 (Community 6): Britta goes to get the pizza without playing "Roxanne." Pierce volunteers the fact that he banged Eartha Kitt in an airplane bathroom. Jeff hits his head on the ceiling fan and is tended by Annie in the bathroom. Pierce terrorizes Troy with the Norwegian troll. Britta arrives with the pizza and the pizza man whom she is now engaged to. Timeline 5 (Community 1): Troy goes to get the pizza. Jeff stops Britta from singing "Roxanne." Pierce says he banged Eartha Kitt in an airplane bathroom. The replica Indiana Jones temple goes off and ejects the ball, which rolls on the floor and causes Annie to slip, which causes her purse to fall and the gun to go off which shoots Pierce in the leg. Britta comes out from the bathroom and drops her joint, which starts a fire. Troy arrives with the pizza and sees the Norwegian troll in the middle of the flames and screams. Timeline 6 (Community 5): Abed goes to get the pizza. Jeff stops Britta from singing "Roxanne." Pierce brags that he banged Eartha Kitt. Jeff hits his head on the ceiling fan and is tended by Annie. They kiss. Britta, overcome with the munches, eats some of Shirley's mini-pies, then lets slip that she shouldn't have, as they are not supposed to encourage her to bake. Annie says that Jeff reminded him of her dad. Pierce tries to take back his present before Troy opens it, but fails to and Troy sees the Norwegian troll. Everyone starts arguing. Abed arrives with the pizza. Timeline 7 (The "Canon" Timeline, Community Prime): Abed catches the die and says that they should stop creating alternate timelines for two reasons: a) together they can weather anything and b) Jeff is a conniving son of a bitch who used a six-sided die when there were seven people - so he would never be the one to get the pizza. Jeff goes to get the pizza and hits his head on the ceiling fan. The others laugh and call it karma. Britta starts to sing "Roxanne" and Shirley joins in. Soon everybody is singing and dancing. Pierce throws the Norwegian troll in the trash. Abed invites Annie to come live with him and Troy. Jeff arrives with the pizza and says, "Look what happens when I leave you guys alone." The Tag: In the timeline where Troy went to get the pizza, Pierce has died from his leg wound, Jeff lost an arm in the fire, Shirley's become a drunk, Annie's in a mental ward, Troy lost his larynx (from trying to swallow the Norwegian troll), and Britta's dyed a strip of hair blue. Abed declares that since this is the darkest of the timelines, that they should all agree to be their evil counterparts, wear evil goatees made of felt, and try to break into the real timeline to take over their lives. Troy and Abed put on their felt goatees: "Evil Troy and Evil Abed!" Meanwhile, in the normal timeline, Abed senses a disturbance, only to brush it off.
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