SNAKE: This is Solid Snake. Your reply, please. COLONEL: Good, Snake - you're in position. I'm not going to lie to you: this may be the most dangerous mission of your life. SNAKE: I'm listening... COLONEL: You'll need to infiltrate the darkest recesses of the Metal Gear fandom, and retrieve a fic that is actually worth reading. SNAKE: Fan...fic? You mean those horrible stories about us that nerds with no life like to write? MEI-LING: That's right, Snake. You need to be extremely cautious in your judgement. Remember what Theodore Sturgeon said: "90% of everything is crud".