She was born, given to paedophile ladies who kept her in a closet for 16 years, then given back because she was too attached to them and became a burden, she then managed to find the only fucking spinning-wheel in the entire kingdom and kill herself with it. Unfortunately, she was sent into a coma which lasted some amount of years, which caused the rest of the kingdom to put their lives on hold, literally. A long time later, after finding the RIGHT prince, fighting through an overly grown garden of THORNS, being captured and sexually assaulted by recurring villain Maleficent, law suits against Maleficent, more fighting through THORNS which now have a mind of their own, killing Maleficent with some sort of futuristic laser gun from the space ship Enterprise, hosting a prime time cooking sho