| abstract | - The film opens with U.S. Coast Guard Lieutenant Jordan (Joey Forman) responding to a number of pleas for help from sailors off the coast of Southern California. This is the type of event that the Coast Guard has to put up with on a regular basis, and it is one of the reasons why Jordan requested to transfer to a new station. He is handing over the reins to Ensign Tom Garland (Robert Morse), a polite but remarkably clumsy fellow who will now report to Commander Taylor (Don Ameche), a man who fought in World War II with Garland's father and holds him in high regard. Through a series of events, we see Garland's ineptitude as the station's new skipper. He repeatedly flounders in tending to the various minor issues plaguing the crowded waters' impatient travelers. It also doesn't take long for him to set his eyes on Kate Fairchild (Stefanie Powers), a "girl next door" type who runs a local boat rental and sailing school spot on the coast. Meanwhile, three jewel thieves are making their way to Mexico while listening to reports of their pursuit. There's ringleader Harry Simmons (Phil Silvers) who poses as a "commodore" and dispatches orders to his two associates, Charlie (Mickey Shaughnessy) and Max (Norman Fell). This trio has managed to steal a jewel collection, and they intend to smuggle them inside an assortment of casually-hollowed food. They decide to rent a boat from Kate to make their way south of the border, although none of the three know how to sail. The Boatniks follows Tom's nautical misadventures and romance, while at the same time following the attempts of the jewel thieves to escape to Mexico. With Kate's suggestion that the crooks' suspicious behavior might indicate criminality, she and Tom begin to suspect that they are indeed the three men reported about in a newspaper article. Tom is right about the suspects, but Commander Taylor doesn't initially believe it. Ultimately, Garland is able to convince Taylor, retrieve the stolen jewels, and ensure that the jewel thieves are arrested.
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