| abstract | - The eBay is the world's most popular online auction website, founded in 1995 by computer programmer Iranian French entrepreneur Pierre Omidyar. His mixed ethnicity, 2 parts Axis of Evil, 1 part All-American beefcake, has been expressed in his Internets Tube. On one hand, the eBay is a triumph of American free market economics, with a net worth that approaches the value of Dick Cheney's secret Halliburton stock. On the other hand, the Internets Tube suffers from the crippling defect in that it cannot handle bids over $99,999,999, as was discovered during Stephen Colbert's Portrait of Stephen Colbert with Portrait of Stephen Colbert auction in October of 2006. This excludes much of the merchandise that might be bought or sold by those greatest of Americans, members of Colbert Platinum. On the third hand, what the hell is an eBay?!
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