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| rdfs:comment | - These items are available from the Chairs tab when placing items. Currently, this page is organized as the items appear on ingame.
- Chairs are fishy creatures. (a chair, on the other hand, is entirely trustworthy) They can be found giggling and munching on whatever things you happen to leave atop them - including other chairs. In any case, make sure never to sit on them while unpresent, as you never know if you'll still be in one piece once you get back to see whether you are or not.
- Chair may refer to:
* Wooden Chair
* Palm Wood Chair
* Ebonwood Chair
* Rich Mahogany Chair
* Pearlwood Chair
* Living Wood Chair
* Cactus Chair
* Bone Chair
* Flesh Chair
* Mushroom Chair
* Skyware Chair
* Shadewood Chair
* Lihzahrd Chair
* Blue Dungeon Chair
* Green Dungeon Chair
* Pink Dungeon Chair
* Obsidian Chair
* Gothic Chair
* Glass Chair
* Golden Chair
* Honey Chair
* Steam Punk Chair
* Pumpkin Chair
* Spooky Chair
* Pine Chair
* Living Wood Chair
* Frozen Chair
* Dynasty Chair
- The earliest chairs were used by cavemen and took the form of rocks. Cavewomen generally approved of these at the time because the rocks were usually hard with uncomfortable points on them, and this kept the cavemen from spending too much time just sitting around on their lazy patoots. As the cavemen hunted, over time, they were able to find more comfortable rocks, which they brought home and used to replace the less-comfortable rocks favored by the women. As the cavemen found more comfortable rocks, they spent more time sitting and playing in the fires, rather than doing more productive activities. Soon the women began to hide and discard the comfortable rocks and replace them with pointier models. Womens' chair-removal organizations grew and for many centuries the men were powerless to k
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| abstract | - These items are available from the Chairs tab when placing items. Currently, this page is organized as the items appear on ingame.
- Chairs are fishy creatures. (a chair, on the other hand, is entirely trustworthy) They can be found giggling and munching on whatever things you happen to leave atop them - including other chairs. In any case, make sure never to sit on them while unpresent, as you never know if you'll still be in one piece once you get back to see whether you are or not.
- Chair may refer to:
* Wooden Chair
* Palm Wood Chair
* Ebonwood Chair
* Rich Mahogany Chair
* Pearlwood Chair
* Living Wood Chair
* Cactus Chair
* Bone Chair
* Flesh Chair
* Mushroom Chair
* Skyware Chair
* Shadewood Chair
* Lihzahrd Chair
* Blue Dungeon Chair
* Green Dungeon Chair
* Pink Dungeon Chair
* Obsidian Chair
* Gothic Chair
* Glass Chair
* Golden Chair
* Honey Chair
* Steam Punk Chair
* Pumpkin Chair
* Spooky Chair
* Pine Chair
* Living Wood Chair
* Frozen Chair
* Dynasty Chair
- The earliest chairs were used by cavemen and took the form of rocks. Cavewomen generally approved of these at the time because the rocks were usually hard with uncomfortable points on them, and this kept the cavemen from spending too much time just sitting around on their lazy patoots. As the cavemen hunted, over time, they were able to find more comfortable rocks, which they brought home and used to replace the less-comfortable rocks favored by the women. As the cavemen found more comfortable rocks, they spent more time sitting and playing in the fires, rather than doing more productive activities. Soon the women began to hide and discard the comfortable rocks and replace them with pointier models. Womens' chair-removal organizations grew and for many centuries the men were powerless to keep their comfortable chairs. Over time this gave rise to the notion that the women should be the interior decorators. However, after several grueling centuries, mens' sore butts motivated them to organize enough to get more comfortable chairs, and in Ancient Greece, men managed to pull a fast one on their wives and procure comfortable chairs. Because television had not yet been invented, the men created parliament and used it as an excuse to waste more time sitting in their chairs. Eventually even men in the lowest caste of the Ancient Grecian society had comfortable chairs, and soon absolutely no work was being done. Men from other nations heard about comfortable chairs, and decided to take them by force instead of making them themselves. The armies of Ancient Greece, lax from too much sitting around, were quickly overpowered, which led to the fall of that nation. Over time the cycle of hard chairs changing to comfortable chairs led to the fall of several notable empires and monarchies, including the Roman Empire, the Ottoman Empire, and even kingdoms in Biblical times. When David spent his time herding sheep, he was easily able to defeat Goliath (see 1 Samuel 17). However after he began to sit on a throne, he soon fell prey to usurpers (see 2 Samuel 15). Only after he roamed around in the wilderness without a chair for awhile was he able to reclaim his kingdom (see 2 Samuel 18). In yet another example, in pre-modern Japan the Samurai, who knelt on the floor in a very uncomfortable position, were able to quickly take power from rulers in chair-sitting fiefdoms. After the invention of the printing press by Johannes Gutenberg in 1448, people (mostly the women) began to read the Bible and other historical documents and re-learned the folly of chairs. Puritan Christians who learned from all of David's mistakes outlined in the Bible, soon invented chairs (pictured on right) that would keep their men from being lazy and over run. However, over time as chairs again began to increase in comfort, men had to invent work that required them to spend more and more time sitting in chairs to keep the women from again replacing their comfortable chairs with pointy rocks. Thus professions such as the computer programmer and the technical writer were born.
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