| abstract | - Nien "Nonk" Nunb, sometimes referred to as Nien "Nonk" Noob or just Nonkin' Nien was a Molluskan Mollusk who flew a ship called the Millennium Falcon that came close to destroying a planet. But, despite what Nonkin' Nien might tell you, the Death Star wasn't a real star. Real men blow up real planets with real "people" coming from them. And, to be fair, most of what Nien Noob claimed to have done was really done by Mr. Cool 'n' Smooth. By all accounts, Nunby Nien was a bit of an ugly bastard. Whereas most people have frilly underwear, Nonk had a frilly face. With a big fat face, flappy bits of what we think is skin and big, piggy ears, his idiot hat completed the image of a Mollusk that really does look like an idiot. And, when he opens that mouth of his, he speaks a lot of unintelligible shit anyway. So we're not really missing much by ignoring this little guy altogether, really. Sadly, some people disagreed. One person even disagreed to Chewbacca's face, after Chewbacca told him to speak intelligible language. (Shh, don't tell Chewie Wookiee isn't all that intelligible.) Now, we all know not to argue with a Wookiee. But this idiot didn't. And things didn't end happily for him. Or Nonkin' Nien.
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