| abstract | - The Battle of the Sexes, fought between male and female, has raged as long as a difference has existed. But what is the battle, and does it exist? Who stands to gain from the current system, and what are the likely related changes to society in the future? These are important questions which need to be answered... This however is a load of male centric fanny jokes.
- Somewhere on the outskirts of Konohagakure sat a small bar filled with travels and locals alike. Majority of these people were men and not the attractive kind. They were all among each other, enjoying themselves, discussing rather perverted things about the few women within the bar. And among these men was none othe than the Perverted Copy Wheel Eye of Justice himself, too enjoying the rather explicit topics about the opposite gender. Suddenly, the entrance of the flung open. Everyone immediately turned their attention to the door, eyeing whomever was standing there. The room was filled with silence as the figure moved, all eyes were seemingly on her. Many were studying the fine structure of the woman's build, some even whistled at her shouting her name and calling her "Hot Mama". Of course many knew her, as she was considered to be on top a pedestal --considered to be one of the Leaf's top tier kunoichi. Wearing her usual shinobi attire of a whole piece black leather suit which hugged her hourglass frame, she was a pleasure sight for sore eyes. She quietly took her seat and ordered her usual drink, sipping in silence, ignoring the chatter behind her. Dedication was key here, Sigma knew the people in this bar very well, just as he knew the people in Konohagakure. He knew this lady was Senjō of the Senju, however in his deepest opinion she was of his royalty such as himself. Standing to his feet, he mad his way towards the red hot lady, second guessing himself. "Eh, Senjō." This isn't a place for little ole ladies like yourself. A fight could break out at any time, and who the men hit is completely randomized." Sigma sat in astray next to her, flicking his wrist a little telling the lady to go ahead and go home. While he tried to look out for her best interest, Sigma had something else in mind as well. She peeked her eyes at the young man before focusing back at the beverage in front of her, not even bothering to take a second glance. "I should be telling you the same thing. I'd hate to watch you get pulverized by raging men here. I am actually very surprised that your father isn't here to hold your hand. Looks like you finally put your big boy pants on." She giggled, flipping her silky red hair. "It is best that you do not worry about me. I am fully capable of handling myself, although, I don't think that I can say the same for you. You're still just a little boy." It was quite clear, that he had the same joke over and over again. K'un himself emerged, as a spirit entity sitting on his shoulder. It had even gotten to the point that Sigma had grew tired of it. "Another person with the age puns I see. At my age, you couldn't do have the things I'm capable of. This bar, is actually property of my mother. She bought it." Stepping from the seat next to the women, Sigma reached onto the bar and picked up at toothpick. Drilling it at the dart board, it landed precisely in the bullseye. "Even at your current age you wouldn't be able to stand on par with someone as myself. The killing part about it is, I'm only a little boy." "Oh." She replied, turning the stool with her body facing him completely. "I can help but be intrigued by you claims. One in possession of the Rinnegan thinks he's better than me... You're quite the little joker, are you? That's cute. Throwing the little toothpick at the dart board, was it supposed to be intimidating? I surely hope not." She flipped her hair once more. "But if it was...I'm willing to except your challenge. You have really big mouth of you. Clearly your father didn't teach you how to approach a woman. I want to be to shut you up. So. Prove me wrong. Show me how much of a man you are." "My throwing the toothpick in the dart board had nothing to do with me being intimidating. However you're thought process as to why I had thrown that toothpick is highly simplistic." The bartender smashed his two hands together and instantly the bar turned into a large plain field. With trees and mountains as if it were all natural. "I'm not the one to go around fighting I usually like to protect. However, when it comes down to the insulation of my age, I can't bear but to let that person feel every quake and tremble as they feel the power that was bestowed upon me. Yes Senjō, unlike when I joke with others doing battle, I will not do the same here today." Placing his hands forming a unique seal, Sigma summoned a shadow clone. The woman followed him out of the bar swaying her think rump as she walked. The tension grew as groups of people followed the two out of the establishment. Senjō's face remained unchanged, as she face the young man, giving him her undivided attention. She flipping her hair yet again before staring the man down with her light blue eyes. "And yet you continue to talk. I want to see your power up close and personal. Let's see if this power you possess is as interesting as you claim." With those words, she effortlessly brought her finger to her soft pink lips. In an attempt to after the man, she lightly blew a kiss at him, winking then biting her low lips. "Come on baby, show me what you got." Smashing his own two hands together, Sigma began to knead tremendous chakra within his stomach and as it merged together began to compress it. Locking onto his target, Sigma had released a ball of dangerous flakes which erupted the battle field, bursting into a tsunami of flames. The wave rusted towards the woman, destroying an and everything in its path. The clone stood by Sigma's side awaiting orders from its original. "Hey Sigma, I don't think that was a peaceful move." The woman giggled as the young man blasted the fireball at her, destroy the ground with it's path. "Hmph.. Is that all?" She stated, weaving a combination of hand seals together. Kneading chakra within her mouth, she release a dense torrent of water directly at the fireball, cutting it in half before it evaporated creating a thick mist that soon filled the entire area. "Heh" she giggled again. Since the attacks were made with chakra from both parties Sigma's Sharingan and Sensory abilities would be considered obsolete in a situation like this one. Even the former's dukka sensing abilities he still would be about to detect her, as she bared no ill intentions or negatives emotions toward him. Extended her arm, Senjō caused a metal rod to erect from her palm. Breaking it off from her skin, she stabbing the metal rod, which contained her chakra, into the ground. She repeated this action several more times, throwing the rods to different spots in the area. It appeared Senjō did her homework... But not good enough. In fact, she made maybe a C, and was far from making a B. She didn't know what true dukka was, and the fact that she didn't would come to bite her in the ass later on. Dukkha isn't the emotion one feels towards a specific target, it's the pain and suffering one had endured throughout a life time. It was literally nearly impossible to erase such things. From the moment Sigma and Senjō crossed paths, he had been able to sense her no matter what trivial things she put in place to hide herself. "Oi, Metal Release.. Something you don't see everyday." Sigma smashed his fingers into the ground, and around both himself and his clone appeared a barrier protecting the two. "You haven't said a single word to me Seigetsu. Speak up now." K'un stated to his disciple. "I just wanna experience something." "This guy." She scoffed. "What exact is this guy doing?" She whispered, snapping her fingers, Equipping another rod in her hand. "I can't help but wonder what he's got planned. Whatever it is he's already failed." She smart mouthed before dashing toward the barrier, stabbing the flames with the metal rod. Upon collision with the barrier, the metal rods would be incinerated to nothing, and from that Sigma had somewhat of a clue what what was going on. Creating a quick opening at the back of the barrier, the clone quickly ran out and upon instant the barrier closed again. Sigma created another clone to watch his back while he watched the front. As the clone ran around the barrier, it threw Kumasi at Senjō in a barrage at blinding speeds. Somehow even with the mist of chakra, Sigma was still able to sense Senjō's presence, a feat that she would later praise him for. With the deployment of the metal rods she planted earlier, the woman remotely used her chakra with the rods to kept track of moving objects on the ground. She could feel any and all disturbances that happened within the area. Feeling the clone's movement the woman concluded that he was preparing for a counter attack. Immediately she encased her entire body in metal, shielding her from the barrage of kunai. "Is that all?" The clone and Sigma watched as the kunai fell aimlessly to the ground spread all over the battlefield. "Hm, so that validates that. Hey Sigma, the rods, they emit chakra into the ground. She could've just used the vibrations from the rods rather than just wasting chakra." K'un stated to his student, watching as the clone continued its attack. As it dashed for Senjō. Sigma whom had been sitting unharmed in the barrier nodded his head. As he did, black walls began to shoot from the skies, and suddenly the gravitation force had gotten stronger. Only those such as Sigma, whom had trained to become a master with this technique, and extensively his clones, would be able to move freely in the battlefield. The clone continued towards Senjō and in its hand had formed a Rasengan. "Impressive, Kid." She managed to speak as the gravity around her began to weigh her down, creasing any movement or action she had planned to attack him with. "I don't know how counter this." She admitted. The women stood her ground, prepared to take on the full force of Sigma's rasengan. Of course the damage would be minimal due to the protection of her metal body. As the clone collided with Senjō's abdomen, it took note as to how it had been stopped from making complete impact due to the letters metal armor like body. All of this knowledge transferred nearly instantly to Sigma, and quickly the clone would react. While his hand had been driven into Senjō's, he began to ball up his face lacing it in a pressurized chakra. Continuing with his thrust, the body of Senjō would explode near instantly as collision had already been a factor granted the Rasengan. The clone came in contact with the woman's abdominal region forcing the rasengan into her along with some other technique that rendered her metal armoe useless. Exploding on contact, the red head was sent tumbling backwards, crashing into the ground several times before she stopped, crashing into a tree. Her body was sore from what she just received. She did not show the slightest expression as she stared off into the mist, awaiting his next attack. The negating effects of the attack had not effected her body somehow. As to why they did not, it would but up to Sigma to find out for himself. The woman stood up from her kneeling position, regaining her composure in the process. "Heh." She laughed again, snapping her fingers again, sending vibrations into the atmosphere which made the sound seemingly come every direction. In one flick of her arm, the woman's body began glow with a flame like aura. The aura dramatically boosted her speed and defenses making her somewhat immune to nearly all fires known to man. She sped off to the barrier, placing her hand on the box, allowing it to successfully slip through in an attempt to reach him.
- The Bulldogs face the Bikini Bottom Women's Basketball Team, and they're a bit better than they expected.
- Battle of the Sexes is a game-shifting twist employed at the start of a competition that divides the men and women into gender-specific tribes for a pre-determined amount of time. A popular mechanism, the twist has been used in other seasons using the same format or adjusting it slightly.
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