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| rdfs:comment | - Unlike Contreltotapheselachophobia, or the fear of being sexually molested by a shark while being buried alive with it, Tapheselachophobia is much more mysterious. Several theories have arisen as to why this particular nexus of archetypes have coincided so often in the clinical literature. After having treated several patients with Deipnoselachophobia, the fear of having dinner conversations with a shark, Sigmund Freud concluded that most people with social phobia gravitated away from emotionless water-bound killing machines. Uh, let's skip ahead...
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| abstract | - Unlike Contreltotapheselachophobia, or the fear of being sexually molested by a shark while being buried alive with it, Tapheselachophobia is much more mysterious. Several theories have arisen as to why this particular nexus of archetypes have coincided so often in the clinical literature. After having treated several patients with Deipnoselachophobia, the fear of having dinner conversations with a shark, Sigmund Freud concluded that most people with social phobia gravitated away from emotionless water-bound killing machines. Freud showed that people afraid of sharks also had a strange fear of being buried alive. When Freud ran experiments on some chosen subjects of a shark-being-buried-alive nature, he found that the subjects showed a very high level of trepidation. In the 1950's, behaviorist John Watson conducted Tapheselachophobia experiments on several young monkeys that he "obtained" "illegally" "from the petting zoo". Here is an excerpt from Mr. Watson's scientific journal: Uh, let's skip ahead... Mr. Watson's behavioral studies culminated in a simple forty step system designed to help sufferers of Tapheselachophobia and Taphephasmoavioselachohadephobia (being buried alive with flying ghost sharks from fucking Hell). The key to understanding how to treat the disease was knowing why it was scary in the first place.
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