| abstract | - "Wait, what? What's he doing here?" A harried looking, orange-skinned alien flails about as Grimlock tromps on through one of the gallaries- his footsteps heavy enough to make the more delicate exhibits shake and totter on their respective pedestals. Grimlock looks over the area, looking bored...as the alien administrator looks to his datapad. "He's here for WHAT? With WHO?! There's got to be a mistake! Someone tell him it was a mistake before it's too late!" "THERE'S NO MISTAKE!" Galvatron booms as he enters through the opposite end of the gallery, foot steps sounding heavily throughout the hallway. "I am going to fight Grimlock for the Gladiatorial competition right here--and I will ENJOY completely humiliating him!" He looks thoughtful for a moment. "Welll... I suppose, however, that there's no harm in a little good sportsmanship BEFORE the match begins." He approaches Grimlock, offering a hand. "How about a shake before the match, just to show what good sports we are?" Grimlock narrows his optic visor at Galvatron. "Me Grimlock think you liar." he says, but- ever fearless, he stomps forward anyway, extending his own hand in turn to shake- even as he balls his other hand into a massive fist, just in case! Really, it's a matter of who'll strike first... GAME: Grimlock rolls a (100)-sided die: ROLL: Galvatron rolled a 52 ROLL: Grimlock rolled a 44 Galvatron grasps the hand... and then begins applying steel-crushing force to it with his own hand! Locking optics with Grimlock, he says, "See, Grimlock? No harm in a good, FIRM handshake." Some of the alien bystanders in the gallery exchange glances. Awful tense for a polite gesture, really. Combat: Galvatron strikes Grimlock with his Friendly Handshake attack! [Pulled -6] "Grr." Is all Grimlock has to say- though there's the sound of metal creaking beneath Galvatron's vicelike grip! The dinocommander narrows his optic visor- and, with his hand still locked between Galvatron's fingers, he suddenly pulls back- even as he smashes his head forward, testing the density of his helm against Galvatron's in a hooligan-worthy headbutt! Combat: Grimlock strikes Galvatron with his Headbutted! (Smash) attack! Combat: You took 12 damage. Galvatron releases his intense grip once Grimlock mashes his head into his face! "GAAHHHH!" Galvatron screams, stumbling back until he bumps into a stand. A priceless, irreplaceable vase that's thousands of years old tumbles off of the stand and smashes to pieces on the floor. Galvatron glances down at the fragments, and mock-gasps in horror. "GRIMLOCK. Look at what you made me do! That thing--whatever it was--was PRICELESS! I'm afraid I'm going to take some compensation for the damage you caused... OUT OF YOUR HIDE! HAHAHAHA!" And he launches himself at Grimlock, flinging a punch at his head! Combat: Galvatron strikes Grimlock with his Punch attack! Grimlock grunts as he takes the punch full-on- right in the spot he slammed into Galvatron! "Grr! me Grimlock say that YOU OWN FAULT!" he snarls- and then pulls his Energo-Sword out with a *SCHING!*- which, on the backslash, neatly bisects and enflames some sort of spidersilk tapestry. "...Uh, that you fault too." he notes- and then lunges forward, sword chopping downards in a savage red arc! Combat: Grimlock misses Galvatron with his Energo Sword attack! Galvatron smirks as he backsteps neatly out of range of the sword swipe, letting the priceless art catch aflame. "Oh, I don't think so, Grimlock! I have to stop before all of this priceless art is destroyed! And naturally, I thought of the perfect way to do it!" He turns towards a massive painting of a Lovecraftian creature against a surreal backdrop, and lifts it off of the wall. A gallery proprietor rushes towards him, bleating and pleading for him to stop, but Galvatron ignores him, even when the proprietor clings to the tyrant's ankle and finds himself dragged along for the ride. "This work is by the famous artist Skarrzzzfulngh," Galvatron explains. "This depraved creature used its own blood as paint, and the funny thing about that paint is that it congeals rapidly into a tough, rubbery substance. I wonder what would happen if this painting had an ADDITION made to it?" He then lifts the painting up and tries to bring it down on Grimlock's head, and should he succeed, Grimlock will find his movements greatly constrained by the strange, rubbery paint on the punctured canvas! Combat: Galvatron sets his defense level to Fearless. Combat: Galvatron misses Grimlock with his Who Says Galvatron Doesn't Appreciate the Arts? attack! [Pulled -4] "Since when am you Galvytron am, uh, art-guy?" And as Galvatron bears down with a Gigeresque painting of alien goo-blood, Grimlock neatly slices through it with his Energo Sword, setting THAT on fire too! "Maybe you need stick to THAT instead of fightings! Haw haw haw!" And with that, Grimlock thunders forward- with the remnants of sticky gore still burning off his sword, he just swings his left fist around, attempting for a solid body-blow! Combat: Grimlock strikes Galvatron with his PUNCH! (Punch) attack! Combat: You took 8 damage. Galvatron snarls, frustrated, as his gambit literally goes up in flames, but he has little chance to do much about it when Grimlock's punch smacks into his chest, forcing a "Whunnnffft" out of him and forcing him back. This causes him to trip and fall over the proprietor who had been hassling him earlier, and when Galvatron stands, he picks the proprietor up by the scruff of his collar and flings him, screaming, back down the hallway. "Bah!" Galvatron sneers, whipping out his energy mace. "But then, maybe I should take up a career in artwork, hm? Yes, I could create the most beautiful pieces of abstract art--OUT OF AUTOBOTS!" He charges at Grimlock, screaming at the top of his lungs as he whirls that mace above his head, and either by design or by negligence, that flail smashes every piece of pottery, every statue, and tears every painting between himself and Grimlock before he finally swings it at the Dinobot. Combat: Galvatron strikes Grimlock with his Epic Flail attack! Combat: That attack has temporarily affected Grimlock's Accuracy. (Blinded) "Hnh? Me Grimlock thought him Scrapper do that al- OOF!" And Grimlock is struck- and sent reeling into a display of Haldonian Crystal-Bonsai, years of carefully cultivated quartz growth shattered beneath Grimlock's massive bulk! The dinobot snarls- and then transforms to his formidable dinosaur mode- and wasting little time, he swings his tail around, aiming to sweep Galvatron's feet out from under him! With a grunt and a growl, Grimlock changes into a robot T-rex! Watch out. Combat: Robot T-Rex! strikes Galvatron with his BITING (Kick) attack! Combat: You took 13 damage. Galvatron cries out in surprise as the massive tail knocks his legs out from under him, and he slams onto his back with a deafening crash! As it happens, a small vase that Galvatron's mace missed earlier is shaken from its perch by the impact, and it goes tumbling to the floor with predictable results. "AND WHO SAYS I CAN'T HAVE THE SAME HOBBY AS SOMEONE ELSE!?" Galvatron raves as he snaps a kick out at a Dino-knee from the floor. "I AM GALVATRON I'LL DO WHATEVER I WANT! HAHAHAHA!" Combat: Galvatron strikes Robot T-Rex! with his You'll "Knee"d Medical Help After This Match (Kick) attack!
* Keerunch!* Grimlock's knee buckles under Galvatron's kick- and the dinocommander topples, just as planned! Though...it looks like Grimlock's falling TOWARDS Galvatron! And there's enough weight behind that dinobot to make every exhibit in the gallery shake on its mounting as the resounding *THOOM!* can be heard, can be FELT all the way through the next four decks of the spaceship! Combat: Robot T-Rex! sets his defense level to Fearless. Combat: Robot T-Rex! strikes Galvatron with his Dino Crush attack! Combat: You took 18 damage. Combat: Robot T-Rex! 's attack has damaged your Velocity! Galvatron allows himself a triumphant grin as his kick finds its mark, but as always seems to be the case with Dinobots, fighting them is generally an exercise in frustration, exhaustion, and pain. "GAAHHHHH!" Galvatron screams as the heavy Dinobot falls onto him, and, adding insult to injury, does more damage to him by *accident* than by intention. "You... lummox!" Galvatron seethes, arms and legs comically wiggling about under the heavy Dinobot. "Get... off of... me!" Eventually, Galvatron gets his bearings together enough to try and plant his legs under Grimlock's chest, and then kick him off--all the way down the hallway! Combat: Galvatron misses Robot T-Rex! with his GET OFF attack! [Pulled -2] Robot T-Rex! is thrown across the room! But miraculously, he lands on his feet- and, lashing out with a tiny clawed-arm, he sinks his claws in to steady himself! It's just the bulkhead he wrecks this time- but there was still some gilded moulding along the edge. "Hm! You Galvytron wanna give up yet? Me Grimlock bet there still time for you to take tour! Haw haw haw!" and with that, Grimlock thunders forwards, lowering his head as he aims to ram right into Galvatron and plow him through the wall of the gallery! Combat: Robot T-Rex! strikes Galvatron with his Don't get carried away! (Ram) attack! Combat: You took 3 damage. Combat: Robot T-Rex! 's attack has damaged your Agility! Galvatron is smashed right through the wall! And beyond that wall was the female sapient's restroom! "EEEEE!!!" go various female aliens, robots, and the occasional human as they go fleeing out of the restroom, sometimes trailing toilet paper. Galvatron eventually falls to the tiled floor once Grimlock loses momentum, and with a pained grunt, forces himself to a crouching position. "Hnnngh... oh, NOW you've done it, Grimlock! You're not supposed to be in this restroom, you're not a femmebot! At, least, I DON'T THINK SO! But anyway, while you're here..." He wrenches a sink right out of the wall as he stands up. "YOU MAY AS WELL GET CLEANED UP!" And he swings that sink at Grimlock's head! Combat: Galvatron strikes Robot T-Rex! with his It's Not the Kitchen Sink But It Will Have To Do (Punch) attack! "ARgh!" Grimlock ducks his head down as the sink shatters over him- in reply, he transforms- and then takes a moment to glance around, confused. "Huh. So that what this room looks like. Huh." he shrugs- and then gets back to the brawl! Shifting his stance just a bit, Grimlock swings a fist around- looking to grab hold of Galvatron's head, and haul him towards a large (and thankfully unoccupied) stall- at which point it's a simple matter to smash his head downwards! "Me Grimlock see this in movie once!" he declares, proudly.
* FLUSH!* Combat: Robot T-Rex! sets his defense level to Aggressive. Combat: Robot T-Rex! strikes Galvatron with his Robo-Swirle! (Kick) attack! Combat: You took 9 damage. Combat: Robot T-Rex! 's attack has damaged your Strength! Galvatron completely spazzes out as Grimlock forces his head into the toilet bowl, flailing his arms and legs around as the toilet is flushed and water goes straight up his mouth. "BLURRGHHH!" While he's glad there's no cameras in here to record this part of the fight--at least, he hopes so--he doesn't like this sort of treatment, so he counters Grimlock's attack by swinging both fists at either side of the toilet bowl and smashes it into pieces. With the toilet bowl gone, Galvatron is free to move around again, yanking his head away from the Dinobot and staggering back to his feet. "You... you... YOU DARE GIVE ME A SWIRLIE!?!?! ME!?!?! GALVATRON?!?!? I'll give you something, Grimlock!!! A SLOW AND PAINFUL DEATH!!! AHHHHHHH!!!" He then charges at Grimlock, and as the Dinobot did to him, so Galvatron does to the Dinobot, and attempts to smash him through the wall! But what's on the other side? Combat: Galvatron strikes Robot T-Rex! with his And Behind Wall Number 2... attack! Combat: That attack has temporarily impaired Robot T-Rex! 's Agility. (Crippled) Robot T-Rex! looks smug. "Me Grimlock give you swirly! Me Grimlock so- OOOF!" And Galvatron smashes Grimlock something fierce, carrying him through yet another wall...and into the gift shop! Well, at least the stuff here is, by definition, replaceable. Grimlock shakes his head, clattering into shelves full of folded T-shirts and novelty hats...and he just glares at Galvatron- seething...but still infuriatingly active. "You Galvytron done yet?" he growls. Combat: Robot T-Rex! takes extra time to steady himself. [Pass] Galvatron stomps towards the Dinobot, the water from the toilet evaporating in a great cloud of steam from his body as his rage sends his internal temperatures skyrocketing. "Am I done yet, he asks? No, Dinobot, NO..." Galvatron snarls, optics twitching. "I am not done. I am not even close to being done! Not until I have pulled you apart LIMB FROM LIMB! AHHHH!!!" And Galvatron lifts up an entire shelf full of badly painted Chinese figurines--apparently China even sells cheap goods to other planets--and hurls it at Grimlock! Combat: Galvatron strikes Robot T-Rex! with his No Time For A Breather (Punch) attack!
* KEERASH!* Well, it's not Horri-Bull in a china shop, but it still makes Grimlock wince! "Grr!" the dinobot snarls- and transforms, pushing shattered tchotchke's off of him in a veritable avalanche of broken souveniers! And again, Grimlock has his sword out- and with a *Sching!* he chops through a few errant wall-hangings...and perhaps into Galvatron himself! There's a flurry of moving parts, and Grimlock changes to his robot mode! Combat: Grimlock strikes Galvatron with his Energo Sword attack! Combat: You took 13 damage. Combat: Grimlock's attack has damaged your Accuracy! Galvatron howls in pain and anger as the sword slices deeply into his arm, and the tyrant stumbles back, clutching the gash in his arm, energon dribbling from the wound and cycling heavily. The tyrant is clearly exhausted, and on his last few legs, but when Galvatron realizes that he might actually lose to Grimlock, it fills him with an unimagineable fury! "Rrrgh... rghhh... RGHHH! NO! I REFUSE TO LOSE TO A DINOBOT IN ANY CONTEST OF STRENGTH! SO I WILL DESTROY YOU AS I HAVE COUNTLESS TIMES OUTSIDE OF AN ARENA! DIE GRIMLOCK DIEEEEE!" And then Galvatron transforms into his artillery mode, and fires a blinding, powerful beam of raw destruction at the Dinobot, the raw power of which catches the carpet on fire as it streaks towards its target!!! But... wait a minute! Isn't this a Gladiatorial match? Galvatron falls forward, collapsing into himself as he converts into his dreaded artillery mode! S**t just got real! Combat: Galvcannon strikes Grimlock with his Galvcannon attack! [Pulled -3] Combat: You are running low on energon! Galvcannon transforms and emerges from the attack, grinning at the damage he did to the sprawling Dinobot, but then the grin vanishes when he realizes his mistake! A loud bullhorn goes off, and an unseen announcer declares, "Galvatron has been disqualified due to the use of an illegal ranged attack! THE WINNER IS GRIMLOCK!" Galvatron panics for a moment, looking around as if for the announcer. "What!? NO! It was a mistake, I--DAMMIT! I HATE DINOBOTS! AHHHHH!" The scene fades to black as Galvatron screams, shaking both his fists in rage at his own impulsive actions.
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