| abstract | - Now, it was about 11:00 PM at night. Dammit, where was Mitsuru, anyway? That devil woman probably may have sent him somewhere to get her something unnecessary—like octopus testicles to serve for dinner. Hopefully not, Gai thought, as he trudged back and forth like a pendulum, never-endingly. To ease the burden of having to explain why there were an ever-increasing amount of people who unpacked their bags in Mitsuru's apartment, Kazuma had completely disappeared; probably the only thing that he had done to be of help since he was revived. The last thing he told Gai was, "Tomorrow, we're starting training again." Great. Just freaking great. Oh, the joy of having a somewhat stale cake to wait for when he got back; Gai honestly felt like just giving up when it came to people's birthdays; he always failed miserably with finding an appropriate present—which was why, more often than not, Hizashi was pissed at him whenever it was her birthday. Eimi was bouncing around on the sofa, as if she didn't have a care in the world. Thinking to himself that she was perfectly harmless and was in no position to do anything that could potentially be surprise-threatening, his concerns immediately shifted to Kurenai. Ever since that fight with Chira, she hadn't woken up; she was breathing perfectly fine—Nika had told him that she was in a coma of sorts, and she needed a trigger to wake once again; for once, it didn't seem that she was lying. He wished that he could stay by her side until she woke, so that he was the first thing she gazed upon when she opened her eyes, but sadly, he was much too busy, much to his chagrin. Tidying up the living room, a nagging voice in the back of his head reminded him, "you seem like the perfect housewife". Of course, he knew who this voice was, so he chose to ignore its taunts. Knock. Slowly, a figure knocked upon the wooden door; to which Gai ran over to it and opened the door, revealing a soaked Mitsuru. Glancing outside, he noticed that it was raining heavily. By his expression, Gai could tell that he just experienced the equivalent of running through a minefield through that devil woman's machinations. Not to mention, he didn't look too thrilled—didn't seem that anything could cheer him up, that was for sure. Quickly taking his coat from his shoulders and hanging it up upon the coat rack, the Mototsu-Seishin hybrid took his hand, guiding him over to the dinner table. Swiftly, Gai inquired, "M-Mitsuru, what's wrong?" Growling, "…Damn devil woman. She blew up a mountain. She knocked out a crowd of McDonald's customers. She blew up an orphanage. She cut the faces off several hipsters. She stole a shipment of potato chips. She chloroformed me and left me on top of a mountain to fight a robot Dracula in the rain! This day couldn't get any worse…Just let me rest, okay?" Gai's eyes sharpened, as he snarked while placing the cake in front of Mitsuru, "Well, happy birthday, then. Enjoy your cake while being a jackass." Mitsuru sighed, "Oi, don't get snippy with me, hear me?" Gai scowled at Mitsuru; wondering why he even bothered trying to make this a good day for him, really. "…Do what you want." With that, the Mototsu-Seishin hybrid trudged upstairs, irked at himself for attempting to cheer him up. For some reason, Gai thought as if that devil woman had deliberately pissed Mitsuru off as to ruin this occasion; to be fair, it was possible he wasn't too far off. Mitsuru growled to no avail, "H-Hey, wait…!" Oh, boy. Gai was rather unpleasant when he was significantly pissed off—enough to frighten Mitsuru somewhat. Slowly standing to his feet, Mitsuru weakly ran up the stairs after Gai, who wasn't really concerned with what he had to say. Quickly, the Nightwalker grasped Gai's hand tightly, causing him to freeze up. "S-Sorry, Gai…But you've gotta understand; you know how that devil woman works." Swiftly turning around, Gai administered a hefty left-handed slap to Mitsuru Inazuma's cheek; the force of which caused him to recoil slightly. "O-Ow…" He murmured, as Gai placed his hands upon his hips and stated, "Yes, we all know about how she's a hassle. I'd expect you to get used to it by now. Now, get down there." He hassled, while pushing Mitsuru down the stairs, dragging him to the dinner table. "…I didn't make this cake just for myself, you dummy." Picking up a fork and knife, Mitsuru cut off a small slice of chocolate cake, before taking a bite. "…It's not too bad, really—AAAAAGH!" A sound that no being could ever release came out of Mitsuru's mouth, and suddenly, all sorts of memories flashed back to him in his mind—all seventy years of his life. "Oh, wow, all the happiest moments…oh, shit. These are the final moments before death!" These thoughts swiftly danced through his mind, as he felt as if his insides were on fire. Sadly, Gai Nagareboshi had baked this biochemical weapon, so perhaps the spice labeled love could render him immune to the poison. With that, Mitsuru Inazuma continued to stuff slices of cake into his mouth frantically. No ordinary person should be allowed to consume, nor even sample Gai Nagareboshi's cooking. All this time, Gai was off tending to Eimi while attempting to make dessert. "Ah—Mitsuru, does it taste good?" A sarcastic voice resounded throughout the air, as Kazuma, who had used Shunpo to appear for the briefest of seconds to witness this amusing scene, used his eyes to say to Mitsuru, 'The kid made this, you probably won't say anything, right?' as he laid on the ground. As he continued to writhe on the ground, Mitsuru finally replied, "Can I walk towards the light now?" Kazuma responded, "If you do, there's no way in hell you're coming back." Thinking about how one bite can become a fatal blow, the food that Gai Nagareboshi prepared was extremely terrifying. Gai finally turned around, sensing that something was wrong, though not before Mitsuru hopped back up, pretending that nothing at all happened and Kazuma disappeared. "It's great that he didn't see what happened." Mitsuru pondered. As Gai approached him with a tray with two sundaes upon it, Mitsuru began fretting for his safety once again. Now, the tough part of it all was thinking of a proper excuse for not eating such a horror-inducing food. For once, Gai Nagareboshi was actually smiling—not a good sign, not at all. At least his smile seemed genuine; then again, any time he let off a radiant smile was always genuine—Mitsuru could count on his fingers how many time Gai had smiled; four. You know what they say about four being death; ominous, don'tcha think? The Mototsu-Seishin hybrid placed what was upon the tray on the table in front of Mitsuru, urging him to dig in. The Nightwalker realized that this night would either kill him or get him somewhere in this relationship.
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