| abstract | - The TI-83 is a portable gaming device created by musicians from Texas. Though it's not really powerful, the games are totally free! The device was created with one goal in mind: hinder all education by making students play games during school. To ensure students would get away with it, the device is outfitted with very convincing calculator functions. The first student to buy one of these was Paul Kozak who lived in Texas all of his life. Later Paul Kozak changed his name to TI. Kozak as a tribute to the Godly TI 83. This trick was so successful that many schools have been tricked into requiring this device. After all, this costs 85 friking dollars (the Ti-84 is upwards of $100, and the super-gaming-calculator Ti-89 is $150), and it is a total waste of money because the Texan musicians (who prefer to remain nameless) have made obscene amounts of money from this device. Said one of them, "We didn't get a real education, so why should anyone else? Do you think we wanted to be musicians? We're from Texas, for Sophia's sake!"
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