PropertyValue
rdfs:label
  • The Colbert Report/Episode/514
rdfs:comment
  • Turley's opinion is not a contradiction, but proof that the Founding Fathers are douchebags and we have to follow their words to the letter (our hands are tied) * D.C. residents are using the rallying cry: "no taxation without representation" * Louie Gohmert says get rid of their income tax * only a true patriot can turn a slogan of the Revolution into a multiple choice question * in exchange, Utah would get a new district * Utah representative (and friend of the show) Jason Chaffetz took a firm stand against it, which is surprising that he can stand at all considering * his wet strands of angel hair pasta legs * Congressman Nerf Thighs believes in the United States Constitution * he believes Utah will get the seat anyway once the 2010 Census is conducted
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abstract
  • Turley's opinion is not a contradiction, but proof that the Founding Fathers are douchebags and we have to follow their words to the letter (our hands are tied) * D.C. residents are using the rallying cry: "no taxation without representation" * Louie Gohmert says get rid of their income tax * only a true patriot can turn a slogan of the Revolution into a multiple choice question * in exchange, Utah would get a new district * Utah representative (and friend of the show) Jason Chaffetz took a firm stand against it, which is surprising that he can stand at all considering * his wet strands of angel hair pasta legs * Congressman Nerf Thighs believes in the United States Constitution * he believes Utah will get the seat anyway once the 2010 Census is conducted * Dr. Colbert's old nemesis Eleanor Holmes Norton is behind it! * like a fly who buzzes around and won't go away (and can't vote in Congress) * D.C. residents almost have rights * she was able to manipulate The Mob * may happen in a month * Holmes Norton proceeded to bash schools in the great state of South Carolina * she also declared that if D.C. is going to be treated as a state (every April 15th when their taxes are collected) they will get representation in Congress * demanding that Dr. Colbert "swallow that," "understand that," "learn that" * Stephen doesn't swallow * Stephen may have to quarter soldiers in his house * will make Stephen an honorary citizen of Washington, D.C. once they get the right to vote * Dr. Colbert agrees with a TV Promise