| rdfs:comment | - Born in Phoenix, Arizona in 1337 BCE, boy-king Pharaoh "Tut" Tutankhamen moved to Babylonia and ruled Middle Earth. He ascended to his throne in 1323 BCE, after the death of his father Khufuhotep, and reigned for almost ten years. While he was alive, he was a famous disco dancer. It was well know across the land that the ladies simply loved his style. At some point in his life, he ate a hony-glazed crocodile.
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| abstract | - Born in Phoenix, Arizona in 1337 BCE, boy-king Pharaoh "Tut" Tutankhamen moved to Babylonia and ruled Middle Earth. He ascended to his throne in 1323 BCE, after the death of his father Khufuhotep, and reigned for almost ten years. While he was alive, he was a famous disco dancer. It was well know across the land that the ladies simply loved his style. At some point in his life, he ate a hony-glazed crocodile. From the best archeological evidence, it is reasonable to conclude that Tut was a Democrat: He was young, naive, impulsive, and had many wives (showing no regard for the sanctity of marriage). He also enjoyed sacrificing innocent young babies as a part of his godless, self-centered religion. Additionally, he was said to have had three nipples; another common Democratic trait. Boss Tut (as he sometimes liked to be known) gave his life for tourism and was buried alive in his tomb with a donkey by the Rock. Certain ancient hieroglyphics depicted him wearing his jammies during this occurrence. Centuries after his death, King Tut was spotted in the United States, filming an episode of the popular 1960's television show Batman. By this time, his boyish good looks were gone, and he was a flamboyant fat man whose sexuality was in question. After the show was canceled, Tut, like his many costars, was never heard from again untill 2007. That year he succeeded Fidel Castro as God of Metal. As of today his reign still continues. One of the most important things he has accomplished in this function was the excommunication of James Hetfield and the subsequent removal of all known references to him. For this, King Tut received an invitation from his loving subjects and nationals to remain in his position of God of Metal indefintaly.
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